Who are you?
-我是你儿子! -不是问你
-I’m your son. -No, not you.
-爵士 我是兰斯洛特爵士 -爸爸 他是来救我的
-I’m Sir Lancelot, sir. -He’s come to rescue me, Father.
-别这么快就得出结论 -你把卫兵都杀了?
-Let’s not jump to conclusions. -Did you kill all those guards?
哦 是的 对不起
Yes. Sorry.
-他们一个人要付五十英磅! -对不起 我来解释一下
-They cost 50 pounds each. -I’m awfully sorry.
别怕他 我准备好了绳子
Don’t be afraid of him, Sir Lancelot. I’ve got a rope ready.
你一共杀了八位来参加婚礼的客人!
You killed eight wedding guests and all!
你要知道… 事实是… 我以为你儿子是位小姐
Well, you see, I thought your son was a lady.
我能理解
I can understand that.
-快点 兰斯洛特爵士 快点! -闭嘴
-Hurry, Sir Lancelot! Hurry! -Shut up!
光是杀死了新娘的爸爸 这就足够了!
You only killed the bride’s father!
我是不想那样的
I didn’t mean to.
你用宝剑洞穿了他的头!
Didn’t mean to? You put your sword through his head!
-老天 他还好吗? -你甚至把新娘踢到柜子里!
-Oh dear, is he all right? -You kicked the bride in the chest!
-让我损失了一件家具! -我来解释一下
-It’s going to cost me a fortune! -I can explain.
我从卡米洛特向北进发 我得到一个消息…
I was in the forest, riding north from Camelot, when I got this note.
-你是从卡米洛特来的? -兰斯洛特爵士快点!
-Are you from Camelot? -Hurry, Sir Lancelot!
我是亚瑟王的一名骑士
I’m a knight of King Arthur, sir.
卡米洛特是个很好的城♥堡♥ 富饶的地方
Very nice castle, Camelot. Very good pig country.
-是吗? -我准备好了
-Is it? -I am ready!
-去喝杯酒吧? -你真是太好了
-Would you like to come have a drink? -That’s awfully nice of you.
我准备好了! -我是说 您这么通情达理
-I am ready! -I mean, to be so understanding.
您要知道 我一旦进入状态 有时会控制不住
You see, when I’m in this idiom, I sometimes get a bit carried away.
这是大厅 我们要把它造成一个大的起居室
Now, this is the main hall. We’ll have all this knocked through…
-他在那儿! -哦 真见鬼
-There he is! -Bloody hell.
-住手! -知道我是什么意思了吧? 我控制不住
-Hold it, please! -See what I mean? I get carried away.
我真的要道歉 对不起
I’m really most awfully sorry. Sorry, everyone.
他杀了伴郎!
He’s killed the best man!
住手 住手 快住手 这是卡米洛特宫的
Hold it, please, hold it. This is Sir Lancelot
兰斯洛特爵士 他是勇敢的 有影响力的骑士
from the Court of Camelot, a brave and influential knight.
-是今天来这儿的一位特殊客人 -你们好
-And my special guest here today. -Hello.
他杀了我的姑妈!
He killed my auntie!
快住手! 这原本是个欢乐的场合
No, please! This is supposed to be a happy occasion!
我们别再争执是谁杀了谁了
Let’s not bicker and argue about who killed who.
在这欢乐和神圣的婚礼上
We are here today to witness the union of two young people
我们来到这里见证两个年轻人的结合
in the joyful bond of holy wedlock.
不幸的是 他们中的一个 我的儿子赫伯特
Unfortunately, one of them, my son Herbert,
刚刚摔死了
has just fallen to his death.
但我不认为我失去了一个儿子
But I don’t want to think I’ve lost a son, so much as
甚至觉得得到了一个女儿
gained a daughter.
既然她的爸爸悲惨的死去了…
For, since the tragic death of her father…
他还没死
He’s not quite dead!
既然她的爸爸受了重伤…
Since the near fatal wounding of her father…
他好转了
He’s getting better!
既然她的亲爸爸
For, since her own father
看起来要复原了
who, when he seemed about to recover,
突然又死了…
suddenly felt the icy hand of death upon him.
哦 他死了
He’s died!
我希望他的独女真正合法地
I want his only daughter to look upon me
把我当作他的父亲
as her own dad, in a very real, and legally binding sense.
同时我确信在公主和
And I feel sure that the merger, the union between the Princess
勇敢却危险的卡米洛特的兰斯洛特爵士之间的结合…
and the brave but dangerous Sir Lancelot of Camelot…
-什么? -看! 死去的王子!
-What? -Look, the dead Prince!
-他没有死 -不 我感觉好多了
-He’s not quite dead! -I feel much better.
你掉下了高塔 你这个笨蛋!
You fell out of the tall tower, you creep!
-不 我在最后得救了 -是怎么回事?
-No, I was saved at the last minute. -How?
好的 我来告诉你们
I’ll tell you.
别那样! 别那样 不!
Not like that! Not like that.
他就要说了 他就要说了
He’s going to tell He’s going to tell
快点 爵士 这里走!
Quickly, sir, come this way!
不 这不是我的作风 我的逃走应该更具有…
No, it’s not right for my idiom. I must escape more…
-戏剧性? -戏剧性
-Dramatically, sir? -Dramatically.
打扰了 谁能来推我一把?
Excuse me, could somebody give me a push, please?
老妖婆
Old crone!
这镇子里有卖♥♥灌木的吗?
Is there anywhere in this town where we could buy a shrubbery?
-谁让你来的? -说”涅”的骑士们
-Who sent you? -The knights who say “Ni”!
没有 这里没有灌木
No! We have no shrubberies here.
如果你不告诉我们哪儿能买♥♥到灌木
If you do not tell us where we can buy a shrubbery, my friend and I
我和我的朋友会说…
will say…
我们会说”涅”
We will say “Ni.”
随你的便
Do your worst!
很好 如果你不愿意帮助我们…
Very well. If you will not assist us voluntarily…
-涅 -没
-Ni! -No!
没有! 没有灌木!
Never. No shrubberies.
怒! -不
-Ni! -Noo!
不 不是那么说 是”涅”
No, it’s not that, it’s “Ni.”
不 涅 你读得不正确
No, you’re not doing it properly.
-涅 -就是那么说
-Ni. -You’ve got it.
-涅 -涅
-Ni! -Ni!
你们对那个老太婆说”涅”了吗?
Are you saying “Ni” to that old woman?
嗯 是的
Yes.
现在路过的流氓对老妇人随便地说”涅” 真是可悲
What sad times are these when passing ruffians can say “Ni” at will to old ladies.
这里流行瘟疫 没有什么神圣的东西
There is a pestilence upon this land. Nothing is sacred.
在历史上的这个时期 甚至种植 设计灌木的
Even those who arrange shrubberies are under considerable economic stress
也是经济的重要组成部分
at this period in history.
-你是说灌木? -是的
-Did you say “shrubberies”? -Yes.
我是做灌木生意的 我是一名灌木工人
Shrubberies are my trade. I am a shrubber.
我叫灌木工人罗杰 我种植 设计及销♥售♥灌木
My name is Roger the Shrubber. I arrange, design, and sell shrubberies.
-涅 -不
-Ni! -No!
涅之骑士 我们把灌木给你带来了
Knights of Ni, we have brought you your shrubbery.
-我们可以走了吗? -真是根不错的灌木
-May we go? -It is a good shrubbery.
我特别喜欢月桂树 但是还有一个小问题
I like the laurels particularly. But there is one small problem.
什么问题?
What is that?
我们不再是说”涅”的骑士
We are now no longer the knights who say “Ni.”
我们现在是 说
We are now the knights who say,
“艾基 艾基 艾基 帕冈 阻姆炳”的骑士
“Ekke Ekke Ekke Ptang Zoo Boing”!
因此我们必须对你考验一下
Therefore, we must give you a test.
以前说”涅”的骑士啊 测试是什么?
What is this test, knights who until recently said “Ni”?
首先 你必须
Firstly, you must find
再找一根灌木
another shrubbery!
我不想找了!
Not another shrubbery!
你找到那根灌木后 就把它放到这根灌木上
Then you must bring it here beside this shrubbery.
这样就排成了两层 在中间要留一条小路
Higher, so you get the two-level effect with a path going down the middle.
一条小路!
A path! A path!
找到灌木后
Then, when you have found the shrubberies,
你还必须砍倒森林里最高大的树
you must cut down the mightiest tree in the forest
工具是一条鲱鱼!
with a herring!
-我们做不了这件事 -哦 去做吧!
-We shall do no such thing. -Please.
用一条鲱鱼砍倒一棵树? 这不可能
Cut down a tree with a herring? It can’t be done.
-别说那个单词 -什么单词?
-Don’t say that word. -What word?
我不能说 这是涅之骑士
I cannot tell. Suffice to say,
不能听见的一个单词之一
it’s one of the words the knights of Ni cannot hear.
如果你不告诉我们那是什么单词
How can we not say the word
我们怎么能做到不说呢?
if you don’t tell us what it is?
-你又说了! -什么 是”是”吗?
-He did it again. -What? “Is”?
不是”是” 一辈子不说”是” 是不可能的
No, not “is”! You wouldn’t get very far in life not saying “is.”
我的陛下 那是罗宾爵士!
My liege, it’s Robin.
收拾好行装 偷偷摸摸的逃走了
He’s jacking it in and packing it up And sneaking away and buggering off
他落荒而逃 是的 他已不再勇敢了
And chickening out and pissing a pot Yes, bravely he is throwing in the sponge
-罗宾 -陛下
-Robin. -My liege.
-见到你们真高兴 -现在他说了那个单词
-It’s good to see you. -Now he’s said the word!
你们一定没有放弃寻找圣杯的任务
You haven’t given up your quest for the Holy Grail?
他偷偷地逃跑
He is sneaking away and…
闭嘴
Shut up!
不 还没找到 -他又说了那个单词
-No, far from it. -You said the word again.
我在这个森林里寻找圣杯
I was looking for it here in this forest.
-不在这里 离这儿还很远 -别说那个单词了!
-No, it is far from this place. -Stop saying the word!
-那个单词我们听不清 -别吵了!
-The word we cannot hear! -Stop it!
-你又说了那个单词 -就是嘛
-He said “it” again! -That’s it!
我说”它”了! 我说”它”了! 我又说”它”了!

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