比尔和泰德历险记（1989）

– Yeah. – OK.
-记住去把录音机拿来 -好
– Remember to get the tape recorder. – Yeah.
然后把时间定在2点13分播放
Set a timer on it for, uh… 2:13.
-懂了吗 -好的
– Got it? – Got it!
那我要说什么
What am I gonna say on it?
老爸 老爸
Dad! Hey, Dad!
是你的声音 哥们
It’s you, dude.
泰德
Ted?
我在这里
I’m over here.
对 这边
Yeah, this way.
瞧瞧这个
Whoa. Check it out.
“亲爱的比尔和泰德 祝你们的报告能够成功
“Dear Bill and Ted, good luck on the report.
真诚的比尔·S·普雷斯顿先生和泰德·西奥多·洛根”
Sincerely, Bill S. Preston, Esquire and Ted “Theodore” Logan.”
我们真好心
That was nice of us.
“附言 蹲下”
“P.S. Duck!”
-干得漂亮 老兄 -真厉害
– Excellent work, dude. – Way to go!
走吧
Come on.
时间就是生命
Time is of the essence.
我能让各位配合一下吗
May I ask that you all work together
好让大家都能上车
so that we can get down to the car.
非常安静 别出声
Very quiet now. Quiet.
抵着墙 排成一列
Against the wall. Single file.
-快点 比利 -我们要怎么离开这里
– Hurry up, Billy. – How do we get out of here?
这边 爸爸
Over here, Dad.
这边
Down here!
干得好 老兄 我们拖住他了
Way to go, dude. We stalled him.
我还该说点什么
What else do I say?
有请为铁娘子乐队暖场的
And now, opening for Iron Maiden…
怀尔德-史泰林乐队
…Wyld Stallyns!
-赶紧 比尔 背部用点力 -泰德
– Come on, Bill, put your back into it. – Ted?
你觉得自己在干什么
What in the hell do you think you’re doing?
垃圾桶 记住垃圾桶
Trash can. Remember a trash can!
垃圾桶 你到底在说什么
Trash can? What are you talking about…?
怀尔德-史泰林无敌
-把这东西拿开 泰德 -抱歉 老爸
– Get this thing off me, Ted! – Sorry, Dad,
但我们得去通过历史报告了
but we’ve got to go pass our history report.
-对了 我找到你的钥匙了 -泰德
– Oh, by the way, I found your keys. – Ted!
泰德 你在哪 把这东西拿开 泰德
Ted, where are you? Get this off me! Ted!
综上所述 我觉得亚伯拉罕·林肯
ln conclusion, I think Abraham Lincoln
对圣迪马斯所在的世界感到最为震惊
would be most impressed with the world of San Dimas.
我知道我是这样
I know I am.
泰德·洛根 比尔·普雷斯顿 不及格
-去大堂 在左边 -安静点
– Down the hall, to the left. – Quiet.
我相信我能代表沃德老师和罗韦老师的意见
And I’m sure I speak for Mr. Ward and Mrs. Rowe
大家的报告都非常有趣
when I say that your reports were very entertaining
给我们带来了很多启发
and very informative for all of us.
看来今天有一组汇报的成员没有到
So, it seems we may be one report short today,
那我们就能提早走了
so we’ll leave just a bit early.
但重申一次
But once again,
我想感谢各位付出的辛勤努力
I want to thank you all for your very hard work…
谁把灯光调暗了
Hey, who turned out the lights?
大家好 圣迪马斯
Hello, San Dimas.
请欢迎 今天下午的最后一组报告
Please welcome, for the final report of the afternoon,
来自各个历史时期
from all throughout history,
人类史曾见证过的一些最伟大的人
some of the greatest people who have ever lived,
来参加他们的1988年世界之旅
in their 1988 World Tour!
大家好吗 我是比利小子
How’s it going? I’m Billy the Kid.
我想让大家把手放在一起
I’d like you all to put your hands together.
现在 我的好朋友们
And now, my good friends,
有请比尔·S·普雷斯顿先生
Bill S. Preston, Esquire,
以及泰德·西奥多·洛根
and Ted “Theodore” Logan! Whoo!
谢谢 谢谢
Thank you! Thank you!
好啊 圣迪马斯高中
Hello, San Dimas High!
瑞恩老师 和出色的同班同学 老师及宝贝们
Mr. Ryan, fellow distinguished classmates, teachers, babes.
我们的第一位发言者出生于
Our first speaker was born
-公元前470年 -好久不见了
– in the year 470 B.C. – Hi, long time no see.
那时候大部分的世界
A time when much of the world
看起来就像齐柏林飞艇专辑《圣屋》的封面
looked like the cover of the Led Zeppelin album Houses of the Holy.
我们去过那
We were there.
那里有很多楼梯和柱子 也很安静祥和
There were many steps and columns, it was most tranquil.
他被认为是现代思想之父
He is sometimes known as the father of modern thought.
是柏拉图的老师
He was the teacher of Plato,
然后柏拉图又做了亚里士多德的老师
who was in turn the teacher of Aristotle.
重金属音乐教父
黑色安息乐队的主唱
就像奥兹·奥斯伯恩
And like Ozzy Osbourne,
常被人诟病导致了当代年轻人的堕落
was repeatedly accused of corruption of the young.
因为他不会说英语 所以我的朋友泰德
And since he doesn’t speak English, my friend Ted here,
将做他的翻译
is going to interpret for him.
请大家掌声欢迎 听他诉说对圣迪马斯的感想
So please welcome, to tell us what he thinks of San Dimas,
古希腊最大胆的哲人
the most bodacious philosophizer in Ancient Greece…
苏格拉底
…Socrates!
…完全失控了
…is totally out of control.
我知道他是从谁那遗传的
I got a good idea where he gets it from.
如果你和你妻子
I mean if you and that wife of yours
能有一点家教
would show a little discipline
也许你儿子就不会带坏我儿子了
maybe your son wouldn’t be such a bad influence.
家教是你成功培养泰德的关键吗
Is discipline your key to the success with Ted?
没错 他要去阿♥拉♥斯加军校了
Yes, it is! He’s going to an Alaskan military school.
在这全世界
He loves you best…
他最爱你们
…in all the world.
他们在上面干什么
What are they doing up there?
他还喜爱…
He also loves…
棒球
…baseball!
因此 泰德父亲对失败的恐惧
Therefore, Ted’s father’s own fear of failure
导致他强迫自己儿子
has caused him to make his son
变成了他对自己所有
the embodiment of all of his own
最深焦虑的化身
deepest anxieties about himself.
所以 他把侵略性转移到了泰德身上
And, hence, his aggression transference onto Ted.
好吗 泰德
OK, Ted?
非常感谢 西格蒙德·弗洛伊德
Yes, thank you very much, Sigmund Freud.
不 我有一点点恋母情结
Nah, just got a minor Oedipal complex.
我很高兴为大家介绍
It is indeed a pleasure to introduce to you
我们从1269年的中世纪蒙古接来的先生
a gentleman we picked up in Medieval Mongolia in the year 1269.
请掌声欢迎这位杰出的野蛮人
Please welcome the very excellent barbarian…
成吉思汗先生
…Mr. Genghis Khan.
这个哥们 在七百年前扫荡了中国
This is a dude who, 700 years ago, totally ravaged China.
而且据我们所知 两小时前
And who we are told, two hours ago,
扫荡了奥什曼的体育用品店
totally ravaged Oshman’s Sporting Goods.
一位最勇敢的士兵和将军
A most bodacious soldier, and general,
贞德女士在法国顽强地抗击英格兰军队
Ms. Of Arc totally rousted the English from France.
还辅佐法国的王储成为国王
And then turned this dude, Dauphin, into a king
而她做这一切时 只有17岁
and all this by the time she was 17.
水上滑梯
…waterslide.
路德维希·凡·贝多芬的音乐
The music of Ludwig van Beethoven.
如大家所见 成吉思汗很喜欢奶油夹心蛋糕
As you can see, Genghis very much enjoys Twinkies
因为其中极高的含糖量
because of the excellent sugar rush.
他还喜欢台球
He also loves billiards.
贝多芬最喜欢的作品包括莫扎特的《安魂曲》
Beethoven’s favorite works include Mozart’s “Requiem,”
亨德尔的《弥赛亚》和邦乔维的《小心地滑》
Handel’s “Messiah,” and Bon Jovi’s Slippery When Wet.
为了提升她的武器装备
To improve on the condition of her armies,
圣女贞德决定在她回到法国后
Joan of Arc plans on instituting a full-scale aerobics program
建立一套系统的有氧运动项目
on her return to France.
我觉得这行不通
I don’t think it’s gonna work.
不行吗
No?
他爱…
He loves…
他爱圣迪马斯
He loves San Dimas.
现在 有请我们最后一位演讲者
And now, for our last speaker.
美国历史上最伟大的总统之一
One of the greatest presidents in American history…
亚伯拉罕·林肯先生
…Mr. Abraham Lincoln.
八十…
Four score and…
七分钟之前
…seven minutes ago,
我们 也就是你们的祖辈