雷蒙·斯尼奇的不幸历险（2004）

You’re such a good girl, aren’t you?
真是个漂亮姑娘
Such a pretty girl.
你是 你当然是
You are. Yes, you are.
对 你就是
Oh, yes, you are.
亲人逝世 十分离奇
It is a curious thing, the death of a loved one.
蒙蒂叔叔
Uncle Monty?
就好像在黑暗中爬上楼梯回房♥间
It’s like walking up the stairs to your bedroom in the dark
你以为前面还有一节楼梯
and thinking that there’s one more stair than there is.
但是你的脚踩了个空
Your foot falls down through the air,
你会有一瞬间的惊惧
and there’s a sickly moment of dark surprise.
蒙蒂叔叔
Uncle Monty?
孩子们不仅为失去叔叔难过
The children’s grief was not only for their uncle
纪念蒙哥马利 蒙哥马利博士
挚友 杰出的爬行动物学家 慈父
也伤感于再次去温暖的家
but for that tender hope that
更为希望的破灭而哀伤
they may have found home again.
仅有的一丝希望 也被这个十恶不赦的演员
A hope which, thanks to a villainous actor,
一点点无情地蚕食
was now slowly tumbling away.
我感到我多少要为这场悲剧负责
I do feel somewhat responsible for this tragedy.
警告他远离那条致命毒蛇
I should’ve taken it upon myself to warn him
本应是我的责任
that the Incredibly Deadly Viper
它是整个生态系统里最致命的毒蛇
is the most deadly snake in the entire ecosystem.
我应该知道 我发现的这条蛇
I should know. I discovered it.
什么
You what?
探长
Detective?
小姑娘 大笼子门开着 蛇没了
Little girl, the big cage door is open, no snake.
有一具死尸
Dead guy.
你知道我在想什么吗
You know what I’m thinking?
我在想一大早把我叫来就为了这案子吗
I’m thinking, ”Who woke me up at 9 in the morning for this?”
这绝对是蛇咬的 毋庸置疑
It’s definitely a snake bite. There’s no question about it.
蛇咬伤 确定无疑 谢谢 医生
Snake bite, no question about it. Thanks, doc.
你们不明白
You don’t understand, the
致命毒蛇不可能杀了他
Incredibly Deadly Viper couldn’t have killed him,
它是整个动物王国里
because it’s one of the
最友善最没危险的
least dangerous and most friendly creatures
物种之一
in the animal kingdom.
我把这句话省略掉 您看行吗
You mind if I skip the paperwork on this?
我认为那样最好
I think that’d be best.
这些孩子经历了生活中的巨大变动
These kids have been through a major upheaval.
我在想要不要
I wonder if it’s a good idea,
也更改一下他们的旅行计划
even, to change their plans at this point.
我们明天本来要去秘鲁的
We were headed for Peru tomorrow,
-车票都定了不退不换 -不
– and the tickets are nonrefundable. – No.
医生 你说呢
Doc, what do you think?
没准去旅行能让他们走出阴影
Could be the only chance for them to get closure.
很对 谢谢 医生
Closure. Thank you, doc.
通过采访当日事件的目击者
From interviews with witnesses who were there that day,
我得到了得知波德莱尔家
I have learned the following
小女儿的计划
about the youngest Baudelaire’s plan:
勇敢的阳阳从这里开始
Brave Sunny started here
坚决而果断地慢慢接近
and approached the Incredibly Deadly Viper
致命毒蛇
with single-minded determination.
不 他是奥拉夫伯爵
No, he’s Count Olaf,
那个医生是跟他一伙的
and that doctor is his accomplice.
他曾经想用火车撞死我们
He tried to kill us with a train.
他从哪弄来的火车嘛
And where would this man get a train?
我从哪弄来的火车啊
Where am I gonna get a train?
孩子们 不许胡说八道
Children, that’s enough of this foolishness.
斯蒂法诺先生跟奥拉夫伯爵没有一点相似之处
Mr. Stephano bears absolutely no resemblance to Count Olaf.
到底谁是这个超级无敌大帅哥奥拉夫伯爵
Who is this incredibly handsome Count Olaf they keep speaking of?
奥拉夫伯爵是他们的前任监护人
Count Olaf is their old guardian,
已经被解除监护权了
who made an error in judgment.
那纹身呢
What about the tattoo?
奥拉夫伯爵在他的脚踝上纹了一只眼睛
Count Olaf had a tattoo of an eye on his ankle.
为了让孩子们安心
Anything for the kids.
看 干干净净
Voilà? Spick-and-span.
他是个演员 他用化妆品掩盖起来了
Well, he’s an actor. He covered it with makeup.
医生 您能不能帮我把这些孩子
Doctor, I wonder if you could help me escort
-送到车上 -不 波尔先生
– these young children to the vehicle. – No. Mr. Poe…
-不 波尔先生 -我会给你寄明信片的
– No, Mr. Poe! – I’ll send you a postcard.
有一件事 目击者众口一致
About one thing, all the witnesses agreed.
他们说 才接下来听到的声响太震撼 太惊人
The sound they heard next was so shocking, so surprising,
他们一辈子都忘不了
it still haunts them to this day.
该死的 这蛇脾气这么好
Damn it. This was such a good character.
蓝知更鸟 尽情歌♥唱
Bum buttery, bluebird is singing a tune
孩子们 放心吧
Rest assured, children,
当局正在追捕斯蒂法诺先生 他那
the authorities are in hot pursuit of Mr. Stephano,
没眉毛的脸和没纹身的脚踝都上了通缉令
from his eyebrowless forehead to his untattooed ankle.
这个意大利恶魔
The Italian fiend.
尽管又坐回了毫无头绪的银行家的车里
Though still in the clutches of a clueless banker,
漂在泪湖结着薄冰的湖面上
the Baudelaires celebrated their unmasking of Count Olaf
波德莱尔家的三个孩子还是很高兴
as they skimmed their way
他们揭穿了奥拉夫伯爵的阴谋
across the icy surface of Lake Lachrymose.
但克劳斯可不是一个只看事情表面的人
But Klaus wasn’t the sort to think on the surface of anything.
他很清楚这一切事件之下有秘密
He knew there was something beneath their journey,
尽管他所有的线索只有一个望远镜
even though all he had to go on was a spyglass,
另一场大火
the knowledge of another
和一张纸条上的两个字
terrible fire and two words on a slip of paper.
约瑟芬婶婶
Aunt Josephine?
从没听说过
Never heard of her.
你不觉得奇怪吗
Does it strike you as odd
咱们和所有的亲戚都没有来往
that none of our relatives are related to us?
约瑟芬婶婶
Aunt Josephine?
波德莱尔家的孩子吗
Baudelaires? Is that you?
是
Yes.
很好
Oh, good.
请进 请进 请进
Come in. Come in. Come in.
赫尔曼飓风随时都会刮过来
Hurricane Herman is about to arrive at any time now.
维奥莱特 看看你
Oh, Violet. Look at you.
你好
Hello.
快请进 快点 孩子们
Come in, quickly. Quickly, children.
-怎么了 怎么了 -怎么了
– What? What? – What’s the matter?
别太快 你会被门垫绊倒
Not that quickly. You could trip over the welcome mat
把你自己的脖子摔断
and decapitate yourselves.
所以 快进来 但别太快好吗
So, quickly, but not too quickly, all right?
很抱歉这里这么冷
I’m sorry it’s so chilly in here.
有的时候冷得我都受不了
Sometimes it gets so cold I can hardly stand it.
约瑟芬婶婶 要我帮您
Would you like me to turn
把暖气打开吗
the radiator up for you, Aunt Josephine?
不 我从不开暖气
Oh, no. I never turn on the radiator.
我害怕暖气会爆♥炸♥
I’m frightened that it might explode.
孩子们 我必须要求你们
Children, I must ask you
不许用这房♥子里的任何一个门把手
not to use any of the doorknobs in the house.
只要推木头门板门就会开
Just push on the wood of the door, and it’ll open.
为什么
Why?
我一直很害怕门把手
Well, I’m always afraid that the doorknobs
会碎成千万片
will shatter into a million tiny pieces,
打中我的眼睛
and one of them will hit my eye.
瞎嘟囔可不算说话
”Delmo” is not a word.
我看我得好好教教这孩子标准英语了
I can see that I’m going to have to teach her proper English.
研究语法真是人生一大乐事啊 是吗
Grammar is the greatest joy in life, don’t you find?
-绝对是 -我爱语法
– Most definitely. – I love grammar.
太好了 有热汤喝
Perfect. Nice hot soup.
其实这是凉黄瓜汤
Actually, it’s chilled cucumber soup.
我从不烹饪热食
I never cook anything hot.
我害怕炉子会着火
I’m afraid that the stove will burst into flames.
你弟弟呢
Where’s your brother?
在厨房♥里
The kitchen.
克劳斯
Klaus?
你在干什么
What are you doing?
找餐巾
Napkins.
餐巾在这 离冰箱远点