糊涂侦探（2008）

我就是这意思 难道我以为里面装满名牌衣服吗
Exactly. I have no interest in a real football unless it is signed by Joe Montana
你休想唬弄我
and I don’t believe that’s the case.
怎么样 23号♥
Well, 23
知道吗 我们没时间了
You know what We’re out of time.
你们敢跟来 她就死
You follow us, she dies.
停车
Stop this car
麦斯 你这猪头 你是有毛病吗
Max You idiot What the hell is wrong with you
你不能敲打政♥府♥公务车
You don’t just slap your hands on a government vehicle
好吧 等我们回华府 你这白♥痴♥就完了
All right, that’s it When we get back to Washington, you morons are through
可恶 你怎么能隐瞒这么久
Damn it. How have you gotten away with this for so long
竟然没有人看出来 尤其是我
I can’t believe none of us saw it, especially me.
不要自责 反正你快挂了
Don’t beat yourself up. You’ll be dead soon anyway.
他往南向葛兰街
Chief, he’s heading southbound on Grand.
谢了 布鲁斯 继续追踪他
Thanks, Bruce. Keep us posted.
抢我车的天控局疯子
Hey CONTROL assholes who just stole my vehicle
我知道你们在听 别让那辆车有任何损伤
I know you’re listening You two dickwads put one scratch on that car
那是什么声音
What was that
抱歉 收讯不良
Sorry, I’m losing you.
搞什么
What the
我赌二十块 大家打那辆车
All right, fellas. 20 dollars if you hit the car.
老实说 这整件事让我气到不行
Chief, I have to say, this whole thing really steams my clams.
我不敢相信天字23号♥是叛徒
I cannot get over the fact that 23 is a traitor.
沙坑
Sand trap
现场我能体会 你以为我是叛徒的感受
Now I know how you felt when you thought I was a traitor.
障碍物
Tractor
我一向很细心 怎么会没注意到
I don’t know how I missed it. I’m usually very observant.
剑鱼
Swordfish
你想的跟我想的一样吗 我不知道
Are you thinking what I’m thinking I don’t know.
你是不是在想 “要命 剑鱼差点刺穿我脑袋”
Were you thinking, “Holy shit, holy shit, a swordfish almost went through my head ”
如果是 咱们就有心电感应
If so, yes.
来吧
Come on.
（解除）
（启动）
（启动）
我代表美国政♥府♥征收这架飞机
On behalf of the United States Government, I hereby commandeer this plane.
炸♥弹♥启动了 你最好快走
The device is armed. I hope you’re moving.
放心 我会离得远远的
Don’t worry, sir. I’ll be well clear.
他们开到南向47号♥州际公路了
Chief, they’re headed southbound on l47.
谢了 看到他们了
Thanks, Bruce. I got them
我得跳到车上
I need to get down to that car
不行 我飞太低会被发现
No, no good. If I get too low, he’ll hear me coming
我有另一个点子
I have another idea.
你在干嘛
What are you doing
快回来 你这样会没命
Get back in the plane You’re gonna kill yourself
抓紧了
Hang on
（自杀防治热♥线♥）
（18000不要这样做）
抓紧了 我们要下去了
Hang on We’re going in
抱歉 麦斯
Sorry, Max.
周二不行 我有事
Tuesday’s not gonna work. Cannot do Tuesday, I’m already
妈 妈 西恩 西恩
Mom Mom Mom Sean Sean Sean
这样乱喊很烦人耶
See how annoying that is
这就是你的问题 有些男人喜欢女人温柔一点
See, this is your problem. Some men like women more feminine
我不够温柔 对
I’m not feminine No.
我不够温柔
I’m not feminine
别动
Freeze
我真是酷爆了
That was so cool.
麦斯
Max
不管三七二十一了
Damn it to hell.
你替我解开我就能帮忙
You know, I might be more help if you untie me
我右边口袋有一把刀
There’s a knife in my right front pocket
住手 住手
Stop it Stop it
怎么了
What
那不是我的刀子啦 那是
That’s not my knife That’s not my
拿到了
I got it
不要 99号♥ 别碰那按钮
No, 99, don’t touch that
我的天啊
Oh, my Lord.
好耶 姜还是老的辣
Yeah The kid’s still got it.
麦斯 快点
Max, hurry
等一下 99号♥
Hold on, 99
局长 我们停不了车 我们有引爆器 却不知道密♥码♥
Chief, we can’t stop the car We have the football, but we do not know the code
一定要赶快想办法
We need to figure out something
我们会一路冲到放置炸♥弹♥的市中心
These tracks are taking us back downtown, towards the bomb
你们得快逃 跳车必死无疑
We gotta get you out of there, and you won’t survive the jump
我这就来接你们
I’m coming to get you
天啊 抓紧了 99号♥
Oh, God Hold on, 99
我还没玩完 麦斯 我要把公事箱拿走
It’s not over, Max I’ll take that briefcase
想要的话 就拿走呀
If you want it, you’ll have to take it
我就是这样说的呀 我知道 我是故意惹毛你
That’s what I just said I know, I’m just trying to annoy you
不按牌理出牌 但很有效
Unusual but effective.
你没事吧 没事
You all right I’m fine
麦斯
Max
你的脚
Max, your foot
真希望我们 有多点时间相处 什么
I wish we had more time What
麦斯 不
Max No
噢 麦斯
Oh, Max.
不 不
No. No
（启动）
我也希望我们有多点时间相处
I wish we had more time too.
原来你听到我说的话
So you did hear me
麦斯
Max
可是 火车
But the train
就差那么一点
Missed it by that much.
“《快乐颂》计划”
“Operation Joy”
《快乐颂》结束后就会爆♥炸♥
The “Ode to Joy” will end with a bang.
局长 麦斯 你没事吧
Chief Yeah, Maxie Are you okay
听好 我想《快乐颂》最后的音符会引爆♥炸♥弹
Listen, I think the final notes of the “Ode to Joy” trigger the bomb
我们得阻止音乐会
We have to stop the concert
让我搞定
I’m on it.
我的屁♥股♥好像磨掉了一层皮
My buttocks are really stinging from being dragged.
阿公 我跟你说过
Hey, grandpa, I already told you
大声点 我老了 有点耳背
Speak up, son. I’m an old man, you know.
我喜欢这招
I like that tackling part.
真是不好意思
I am so, so sorry about that.
等一下 放开他
Wait No, no, let him go.
这里有炸♥弹♥ 在哪里
There is a bomb. Where
我说在钢琴底下 你们信吗
Would you believe in the piano
这么大一枚炸♥弹♥怎么会没看到
Whoa. How did we miss that That is huge.
麦斯 你是不是 没错 我是乱猜的
Max. Was that A total guess, yes, it was.
那位指挥家真是老当益壮
That old son of a gun can take a hit, huh
我应该告诉他吗 不 让他享受这一刻吧
Do you think I should tell him No. Let’s just savor the moment.
他真会搞笑 对吧
He’s a funny son of a bitch, isn’t he
这是我这辈子最光荣的一刻
This is the proudest moment of my life
炸♥弹♥没爆♥炸♥
Bomb not go off.
是吗 千里眼 你怎么知道
Oh, really, brighteyes What alerted you
因为没砰砰声或是没有蕈状云
Was it no “Boom, boom,” or the lack of a mushroom cloud
我是没看到蕈状云才知道的
It was the mushroom cloud for me.
你很尽职 所以我不能杀你老婆
Well, you did your job, so I suppose I can’t kill your wife.
不过杀了她算是一件功德
Although to be honest, I’d be doing the sighted world a favor.
时间算得不错嘛
What good hang time, huh
是的 总统先生 谢谢你 再见
Yes, Mr. President. Thank you and goodbye, sir.
天字86号♥ 总统要我向你致谢
86, the President wanted me to convey his personal thanks
他觉得你被火车拖着跑 非常厉害
and to tell you how impressed he was with that draggedbyatrain thing.
身为特务 我训练自己不怕疼痛
Well, sir, as an agent, I have trained myself to be impervious to pain.
嘿 虎牙
Ah Hey, it’s Fang.
我要给你一个惊喜
I wanted him to be a surprise.
别这样 没人知道我们在交往
99, please, nobody here knows that we’re dating.
拜托 大家都知道
Yes, they do.
只能亲脸颊
On the cheek.
走吧 再亲一下
Let’s go. Maybe a little one
菜鸟 等一等 欢迎来到天控局
Hey, new guy. Hold up a second. Welcome to CONTROL.
我们有个传统 叫”找菜鸟的碴”
We have a tradition called “pick on the new guy.” Here’s how it works.
我们专门找菜鸟麻烦 你也拿我们没办法
We pick on the new guy. And you can’t do anything about it.