可能是死皮还有干蟑螂壳吧
and desiccated cockroach assholes.
是康策
It was Kountze!
是他先开始的
Kountze started it.
太棒了 奥勒曼先生
Bravo, Mr. Ollerman.
太棒了
Bravo.
太好闻了
Lovely.
谢谢你 玛丽
Thank you, Mary.
我们午餐不是已经吃过这个了吗
Didn’t we already have this for lunch?
而且还难吃的很
And it was crappy then.
能吃到这个你们已经很幸运了
Consider yourselves lucky.
在公元前 149 至 146 年的第三次布匿战役期间
During the Third Punic campaign, 149 to 146 BC,
罗马人围攻了迦太基
the Romans laid siege to Carthage
整整三年
for three entire years.
到结束的时候
By the time it ended,
迦太基人还只能吃沙子
the Carthaginians were reduced to eating sand
就着自己的尿喝
and drinking their own urine.
所以才出现了”刑罚”这个词
Hence the term “punitive.”
呃…玛丽
Uh… Mary?
你要不要…
Maybe you would, uh…
跟我们一起吃
maybe you would care to join us?
不用了 谢谢
No, I’m all right. Thank you.
我知道她对她儿子的事很伤心
I mean, I know she’s sad about her son and everything,
但是她还靠着这份工作赚钱不是吗
but still, she’s getting paid to do a job,
她理应做得更好 不是吗
and she should do it well, right?
但是我想 不管她的厨艺有多糟糕
But I guess, no matter how bad a cook she is,
学校永远也不会解雇她了
now they can never fire her.
你能闭嘴吗
Will you shut up!
你根本不知道她都经历了什么…
You have no idea what that woman has been thr…
康茨先生 对于大多数人来说
You know, Mr. Kountze, for most people,
生活就像是鸡舍的梯子
life is like a henhouse ladder.
又臭又矮
Shitty and short.
你们生来就是幸运的
You were born lucky.
也许有一天 你们这些堕落的小混♥蛋♥
Maybe someday, you entitled little degenerates
会感激这一切的
will appreciate that.
如果到那时你们都不懂得感激 那你们真是没救了
If you don’t, I feel sorry for you
而我们这些老师也是无比失败的
and we will have failed to do our jobs.
现在 吃饭吧
Now, eat.
♪ 愿你们快乐 先生们 ♪
♪ God rest ye merry, gentlemen ♪
♪ 不要让任何事情使你沮丧 ♪
♪ Let nothing you dismay ♪
♪ 记住我们的救主基♥督♥ ♪
♪ Remember Christ our Savior ♪
♪ 降生于圣诞节 ♪
♪ Was born on Christmas Day ♪
♪ 是她将我们所有人从撒旦的权势下拯救出来 ♪
♪ To save us all from Satan’s power ♪
♪ 哪怕我们误入歧途时 ♪
♪ When we were gone astray ♪
♪ 带来了安慰和喜悦的消息 ♪
♪ O tidings of comfort and joy ♪
♪ 那些欢愉 ♪
♪ And joy ♪
♪ 哦 美好的消息 ♪
♪ O tidings of… ♪
没错
That’s right.
下一个问题得五分 姑娘们
Next question for five points, girls.
你最常开的车是什么尺寸的
What are the dimensions of the car you drive most?
注意宽度和长度
And that means width by length.
那你呢 杰瑞
The dimensions of the car you drive most. Jerry?
相当长
It’s pretty long.
哦 我看看 8乘80吧
Oh, let’s see. Maybe, uh, 8 by 80?
你开的是UP吗
What’s the name of your car, Union Pacific?
哦 晚上好 – 晚上好
Oh, good evening. – Good evening.
这是什么
What’s this?
你不知道新婚游戏吗
You don’t know The Newlywed Game?
不知道 – 你住在哪个星球上啊
No. – What planet have you been living on?
我不怎么看电视
I don’t really watch television.
是一个向情侣提问的节目
It’s a show where they ask couples questions
看看他们对彼此有多了解
to see how well they know each other.
这听起来像是在自找麻烦
That sounds like courting disaster.
重点就在这里
Yeah, that’s the whole damn point.
坐下吧
Sit down.
来吧
Come on.
长长见识
Broaden your horizons.
这是七月份的重播
This is a rerun from July.
现在他们是在争夺韦伯牌烧烤架
Which is why they’re playing for Weber barbecues
和野餐用具
and picnic utensils.
很有意思 – 嗯嗯
Fascinating. – Mm-hmm.
如果我们要分开度假
If we ever take separate vacations,
我要把我妻子送去…
I am sending my wife to blank…
哦 谢谢
Oh. Thank you.
那些男孩子怎么样
So, how are the boys?
身心俱碎
Broken in body and spirit.
反正现在是假期 放轻松点儿
Okay, well, it is the holidays, so, you know, go easy on them.
哦 拜托
Oh, please.
他们这一生已经过得很轻松了
They’ve had it easy their whole lives.
而且你也不知道到底是什么情况
You don’t know that.
不是吗
Did you?
而且 每个人都应该和自己的家人一起过圣诞节
Besides, everybody should be with their people on Christmas.
夏威夷 可能吧 – 好 夏威夷
Hawaii, probably. – Hawaii. All right.
他说他会带你去圣安娜
He says he’s gonna send you to Santa Ana
而他选的是拉斯维加斯
and he’s going to Las Vegas.
西伯利亚没人能照看你
Nobody can watch you in Siberia.
你要去哪里
Where are you going?
去维加斯 – 拉斯维加斯吗
To Vegas. – Las Vegas?
是的
Yeah.

No.
这两个人要离婚了
Those two are going to get a divorce.
你怎么知道
How do you know?
我能看出那种表情
I recognize that look of stale disappointment.
她恨他
She hates him.

Oh.
你结婚多久了
How long were you married?
我和柯蒂斯的父亲订了婚
I was engaged to Curtis’s father.
但是在我分娩之前他就去世了
But he died before I gave birth.
哈罗德
Harold.
他在造船厂工作
He worked in the shipyard.
那天 他们背着这么大的 呃
And one day, they was carrying this big, uh,
托货板吧 然后电缆断了
cargo pallet, and the cable snapped.
正好打在他头上
Hit him right across the head.
他们都是好人
They were good men.
两个人都是
Both of them.
他们都没活到二十五岁
And neither of them made it to 25.
我的孩子甚至没有活到二十
My baby wasn’t even 20.
很遗憾
I’m so sorry.
我在柯蒂斯很小的时候就做这份工作
I took this job when Curtis was small
因为我想确保
because I wanted to ensure
他能得到良好的教育
that he was going to have a good education.
你知道他在这里的时候很成功 – 是的 他是个很棒的孩子
You know he flourished here. – Yes. No, he was a great kid.
我教过它一个学期
I had him one semester.
他很有洞察力
Very insightful.
嗯嗯 他很恨你
Mm-hmm. He hated you.
他说你是个混♥蛋♥
He said you were a real asshole.
嗯 呃 就像我说的…
Well, uh, like I said…
一个敏锐的孩子 而且富有洞察力
sharp kid. Insightful.
他一心扑在斯沃斯莫尔
He had his heart set on Swarthmore.
他虽然成绩很好 但是我却没有足够的钱
And he had the grades, but I didn’t have the money.
哪怕有财政援助 但是也还不够
Even with financial aid, it wasn’t enough.
学生贷款也被延期 正好还赶上征召入伍
So, when he got called up and no student deferment,
他就去参军了
off he went.
你知道他对我说了什么吗
Do you know what he said to me?
他说 妈妈 这也有好的一面
He said, “Hey, Ma, look at the upside.
等到他退伍的时候 他就可以靠着退伍军人♥权♥利法案上大学了
When I get discharged, I can go to college on the GI Bill.”
大学啊
College.
现实如何呢
And here we are.
我的柯蒂斯深埋地下
With my Curtis in the cold ground
那些男孩们睡在安全又温暖的床上
and those boys safe and warm in their beds.
就像你说的那样
It’s like you said.