科特·柯本：烦恼的蒙太奇（2015）

然后我坐在她大腿上说 我们上♥床♥吧
And I touched her tits
接着我就摸了她的胸
she went into her bedroom and got undressed in front of me.
她走进卧室 在我面前脱掉衣服
And I watched and realized it was actually happening.
我一边看一边意识到这一切真的在发生
So I tried to fuck her but didn’t know how.
我试着和她上♥床♥ 但不知道应该怎么做
And I asked her if she’d done this before.
我就问她以前有没有干过这事
And she said, a lot of times, mainly with her cousin.
她说干过很多次 多数时候是和她表哥
I got grossed out very heavily with how her vagina smelled
但她下身的味道和汗臭味
and her sweat reeked, so I left.
让我觉得很恶心 所以我就走了
My conscience grew to where I couldn’t go to school for a week.
我很内疚 内疚到一个星期都无法去上学
And when I went back, I got in-house suspension for skipping.
再回到学校时 因为逃课被罚留校停课
And that day the girl’s father came in
screaming and accusing someone of taking advantage of his daughter.
大吼大叫着控诉有人占了他女儿便宜
And so during lunch rumor started, and by the next day,
到了午饭时间 谣言就传开了 等到第二天
everyone was waiting for me, to yell and cuss and spit at me,
所有人都等着对我破口大骂 诅咒我 朝我吐口水
calling me “the retard fucker”.
骂我是个「干弱智的」
I couldn’t handle the ridicule.
我无法忍♥受这样的羞辱
So I got high and drunk, I walked down to the train tracks,
于是我又醉又嗨地走到铁轨旁
and laid down and put two big pieces of cement on my chest and legs,
躺了下来 在胸口和腿上放了两个大石块
and waited for the eleven o’clock train.
等着11点开过的火车
And the train came closer, and closer, and closer,
火车越开越近
and it went on the next track besides me, instead of over me.
直到从我身边的那条轨道开过 而不是从我身上碾过
The tension from school had an effect on me.
在学校受到的关注对我有所影响
And the train scared me enough to try to rehabilitate myself.
而卧轨的事情也吓得我决定要努力恢复我的生活
And my lifting weights and mathematics seemed to be improving
举重和数学也似乎有些起色
so I became less manically depressed.
我也变得不再那么躁郁了
I still never had any friends because I –
但我还是没有任何朋友 因为我…
I hated everyone for they were so phony.
我讨厌所有这些虚伪的人
When Kurt was about fifteen, he moved back in with mom and I.
科特大约15岁的时候 又搬回来和我跟妈妈住了
And it was a struggle, you know.
情况很艰难
It was still, him wanting to rebel and getting stoned,
因为他还是很叛逆 天天抽大♥麻♥
and going out with his friends, and not wanting to, you know do chores.
和他的朋友跑出去混 不想做家务
And you know, he was always wanting to like, just do his own thing.
他总是想要 做他自己的事情
科特的妹妹
He wanted normalcy. He wanted the Mom, the Dad,
他想要正常生活 他想要妈妈爸爸
and the kids and everything happy.
和孩子在一起 一切都很幸福
But then he didn’t, ‘cuz he kind of fought against it.
但又没有如愿以偿 因为他一直在背道而驰
So he fought against what he really wanted.
他一直在抵触他真正想要的东西
Hello? Hello?
喂喂
Hello? Hello?
The Melvins乐队创始成员之一
和巴兹·奥斯本的访谈
喂喂
You still there?
你还在听吗
Yeah, I’m putting you on speakerphone now
我在我现在把你放免提了
Yeah, I’m putting you on speakerphone now
我在我现在把你放免提了
Okay. Are you recording this or writing it down?
好的 你是在录音还是在写啊
Yeah I’m recording and writing.
嗯 我一边在录一边在记
People don’t realize where we really came from, you know?
人们根本不理解我们这些人 你知道吗
People don’t realize where we really came from, you know?
人们根本不理解我们这些人 你知道吗
We are isolated in hellhole is what it really is.
我们在这个鸟不生蛋的鬼地方被孤立着
I mean if witch burnings had been that legal, we’d all be dead now.
焚烧女巫那套 现在要是合法的话 那我们早就死了
– you know? – Fuck yeah!
-你懂吗 -真♥他♥妈♥的没错
Did you ever see that movie Over the Edge?
电影片段”Over the Edge” (1979)
你看过《大河边缘》这部电影吗
Yeah.
看过
I mean, god, that, that movie had such an effect on me.
天呐 这部电影对我影响太深了
Okay you guys, you’re to take these home to your parents.
你们听着 把这个带回家给你们父母
It’s to let them know about a special emergency meeting
to discuss the problems about you people.
要讨论你们这些学生的问题
– I love that movie. – I always wanted to do that at Monte.
-我太爱这部电影了 -我要是能那么做就好了
Me too. I, I tried, you know.
我也想啊 我还试过呢
I wanted to be a vandal. I wanted to hold everyone captive in the school.
我想要破坏 想把所有人都关在学校里
Everybody who’s ever messed with me in one room.
每个惹过我的人都聚到一间屋子里
That’d be just about everybody in town.
那差不多就是全镇人了
We should go down there and tell them all to go to Hell.
我们应该过去 告诉他们都去死
Yeah. Come on.
对 走吧
I don’t know how many of us are willing to admit…
我不知道我们当中有多少人愿意承认
♪ 背景音乐 “School” – Nirvana ♪
…just how deep in trouble some of the kids in this city are.
这座城里的有些孩子已经深陷麻烦之中
Is there anyone ever sat down and talked to these kids?
在场的各位有真正跟孩子们坐下来好好谈过的吗
…six hours a day until I’m blue in the face!
(我跟他们)一天谈六个小时 直到我争得面红耳赤
I spend more time with your kids than you people do.
我跟你们孩子共度的时间比你们任何人都多
You think those kids are interested in learning?
你们认为那些孩子对学习感兴趣吗
You had to come in and see what goes on in a classroom.
那你得来教室参观下那盛况了
Most of the teachers got, the last couple of years in school in the mid 80s,
八十年代中期末几年的时候 对于大部分老师来说
There’s so much Reagan propaganda going on.
Those teachers would just go off on it.
让老师们总是怒气冲天
Practice your piano.
去练钢琴
-Stay practice on it! -Go to hell!
-继续练习 -下地狱去吧
Burn the place the fucking down.
把这地方给我他妈的烧了
Yeah!
好!
High school’s such a worthless fucking nothing.
God, what tortures! You know.
天呐 那简直是折磨
No, I quit the last two months’ school.
我最后两个月的时候退学了
I was so withdrawn by that time,
我那时特别孤僻
and I was so antisocial that I was almost insane, you know.
当时我反♥社♥会♥到差点就疯了
I felt so different and so crazy that people just left me alone.
我感到格格不入 甚至有点疯狂 以致于大家都孤立我
Did Kurt find the underground, or did the underground find him?
是科特先发现地下音乐 还是地下音乐先被送到他眼前
I think he went search of it, and I think they found each other.
我觉得他有在找寻 最终彼此找到了对方
He was searching for whatever made him feel like he wasn’t alone,
他在找寻那些能让他感到不那么孤独的
and that he wasn’t so different.
不那么异类的东西
这面墙能帮助我们思考吗
When did you first hear punk rock?
你第一次听朋克是什么时候
You know, I wanted to hear punk rock for ever.
我一直都想听朋克
‘Course they didn’t have it in our record shop in Aberdeen.
当然了 阿伯丁的唱片店没有摇滚乐卖♥♥
Then finally, Buzz Osborne, who’d been a good friend of mine off and on,
最后是我的好朋友 巴兹·奥斯本
made me a couple of compilation tapes.
给我做了几盘合集磁带
And I was completely blown away.
我完完全全被震撼了
I would lip sync to those tapes. I wore them out.
那些歌♥我反复哼唱 带子都听坏了
And I played them every day, you know, it’s the greatest thing.
而且我每天都在弹奏那些曲子 那是世上最棒的事了
里根去死吧
(Punk) expressed the way I felt socially and politically,
(朋克)能够表达我对社会和政♥治♥的看法
and it was the anger that I felt the alienation.
那种我被孤立的愤怒
And I realized that this is what I’ve always wanted to do.
我意识到这就是我一直想要做的
Just the fact that we were actually playing music live in a room, it was amazing.
就单单是我们在一间房♥里玩音乐这事 就已经很了不起了
It was like the most incredible thing I’ve ever done.
这大概是我做过的最难以置信的事
If we played together in the house, for a couple of hours,
如果我们能连续几个小时 在一间屋子里演奏
and if two people stopped by, we considered that a gig, you know,
要是有两个人顺路来看 我们就把那当成一次演出
a show, that was good enough, we had an audience of two people.
一场表演 我们有两个观众 这就足够了
You know, locals who hated our guts, thought it was terrible music.
当地人都恨死我们了 觉得我们的音乐很烂
I think I was eighteen or nineteen years old, and Kurt was like seventeen.
我当时应该18或19岁 科特那时17岁
But he liked punk rock music, and so that, you know, picked my interest.
可他喜欢朋克摇滚乐这一点 激起了我的兴趣
科特的好友
And then I noticed what a good artist he was.
后来我才察觉到他是个出色的艺术家
And so he was working at the time, as a janitor.
他那时有份清洁工的工作
But he’d always have to like, do some kind of art, usually like defacing something.
但他总要搞点艺术 乱涂乱画之类的
He never had like idle hands.
他从未停下过
It just came out of him. He had to express himself.
就那么自然而然得流露出来 他不得不表达自己
“Heavy Metal,” take three.
重金属
Well who taught you how to play guitar
谁教你弹的吉他
规则1 学着不要弹奏乐器
2 跳舞的时候(或者别的任何时候)不要伤着女孩子
政♥府♥投资 密谋者
我没什么要说或要问
我只是顺水推舟罢了
Brilliant, brilliant, improvisational.
干的漂亮 简直完美 即兴发挥
Jerry Garcia would really like this. I’m gonna send him a tape.
杰瑞·加西亚会喜欢这首的 我要给他寄一卷带子过去
杰瑞·加西亚是摇滚乐队Grateful Dead成员
Send it to Jerry
I just have to sprinkle with patchouli or some thing.
我就撒点天竺薄荷什么的上去
Dig right into it.
他肯定爱死了
来自铙钹制♥造♥商Paiste 租了《橡皮头》 用了钱包里99分钱的优♥惠♥券 下雨天 周六
一对踩钹 踏板 支架 铙钹
兑现支票 鼓棒 吉他拨片 拖车
带上响弦
Wait, wait, wait, ready?
准备好了吗
♪ 背景音乐 “Dive” – Nirvana ♪
未被选用的乐队名字
You alcoholics, film in the dark, dick.
你个醉鬼 黑漆漆的拍什么 蠢货
涅槃
He really didn’t wanna live with his mom, or his dad, he wanted to be on his own.
他真的不想和他父母一起住 他只想独自一人生活
So he moves into this…dump.
所以他就搬进了一个垃圾堆似的地方
He wasn’t making a lot of money, and I think he was scared,
他那时没能挣很多钱
and I think he was scared, not being able to pay his own way. He didn’t know what he was…