– 好吗?
– 呃,先生?
– All right.
– Um, sir?
– 嗯哈
– 我们私下一谈吧,先生
– Uh-huh.
– A word in your ear, sir.
– 当然,当然,当然,当然,当然
– 抱歉
– Sure, sure, sure, sure, sure.
– Excusez-moi.
– 我对待这婊♥子♥像女王一样,兄弟
– 切斯特
– I treat that bitch like a queen, man.
– Chester.
像对待女王一样对待一个女人,那蛋用没有
That shit don’t help, treating a woman like a queen.
– 我他妈的在工作
– 只要你不打坏家具……
– I’m fuckin’ working.
– As long as you don’t break up the furniture,
我可不理会你要做什么
I don’t give a fuck what you do.
– 带上你所有的钱。还要带上你的孩子和房♥子
– 在我看来……
– Took all your money. Gonna take your kids and house.
– As far as I’m concerned,
继续吧,毁了这间房♥吧!
go ahead, trash the place!
哦,但听着,让我向你解释一下我们在说什么
Oh, but, look, let me explain what we’re talkin’ about.
先生,先生,你不必向我解释任何事情
Sir, sir, you don’t have to explain anything to me.
不管怎么,你们尽情玩吧,对你们来说,那是你们的事情
Whatever constitutes a good time, as far as you guys are concerned, that’s your business.
嗯,不,这也是你的事情,因为我们希望你参加进来
Well, no, it’s your business too, Ted, because we want you to take part.
参加什么,先生?
– [ Tooting ]
– Take part in what, sir?
切斯特,你说这事的温和方式就会吓死他
Chester, your way of breakin’ the news to him gently is scarin’ the fuck outta him.
– 你这么觉得?
– 只管说出来吧
– Think so?
– Just spit it out.
好好,我们说了,我们说了,好的
Okay, okay, here we go, here we go. Okay.
事情是这样的,泰德,首先……
Thing is, Ted, first off,
我们绝对不是叫你搅基
there’s nothing homosexual about what we want you to do.
我是说,你可能以为……
I mean, I was thinkin’ you might be thinkin’…
我们要你搞性变♥态♥游戏之类的……
that we want you to do somethin’ like weird sex thing,
你知道,像是给我们口♥爆♥、用尿闭淋我们之类的
you know, like, suck us off, pee on us, shit like that.
绝对不是,绝对不是
Nothing, nothing could be further from the truth.
– 我能不能插一句?
– 不,不。我……我……
– Can I just jump in here for a second?
– No. No. I… I…
我告诉他的方式是东转西绕,云山雾罩
My kind of way of telling him is kind of going all around the world.
– 但这么委婉是值得的
– 是的,嗯,我看出来了
– But it’s the journey that’s worth it.
– Yeah, well, I see that.
但他已来了15分钟了,而你……你知道,扯了所有事,就是言不及义……
But he’s been here for 15 minutes and you have, you know, talked about everything but…
– 关你什么事?
– 你为什么不闭嘴,婊♥子♥?
– What do you care?
– Why don’t you just shut the fuck up, bitch?
– “婊♥子♥”?
– 婊♥子♥!
– “Bitch”?
– Bitch!
呃,对不起,难道你不是收了钱要吸他鸡♥巴♥的那一位吗,小伙子?
Uh, excuse me, aren’t you the one who’s being paid to suck his cock, cork boy?
– 哇!
– 妙句!印名片上!
– Whoa!
– Cork boy, man! Business card!
我看到了一张新名片
– I see a new business card.
– [ Spoon Tapping Glass ]
对不起,如果庭上允许
Excuse me, if it please the court.
容我将我们的意图介绍给西奥多
Allow me to present our intentions to Theodore.
– 我附议
– 我停掉提名权!
– I second the nomination.
– I move that nomination be closed!
– 谢谢
– 由你说了算,里奥
– Thank you.
– The court is yours, Leo.
非常感谢,切斯特
Thank you very much, Chester.
– 泰德,你看过阿尔弗雷德·希区柯克剧集吗?
– 是的,先生
– Ted, you ever seen any of them old Alfred Hitchcock episodes?
– Yes, sir.
看过《由巴西来的人》里彼得·罗伦和斯蒂夫·麦奎因那一集吗?
You ever see the one called The Man From Rio with Peter Lorre and Steve McQueen?
– 呃……
– 啊,如果你看过,你就会记得的
– Uh…
– Ah, if you saw it, you’d remember it.
片名叫《由巴西来的人》,彼得·罗伦和斯蒂夫·麦奎因主演
It’s called The Man From Rio with Peter Lorre, Steve McQueen.
无论如何,彼得·罗伦和斯蒂夫·麦奎因打赌……
Anyway, Peter Lorre makes a bet with Steve McQueen…
赌斯蒂夫·麦奎因不能连续十次打着打火机
that Steve McQueen can’t light his cigarette lighter ten times in a row.
如果斯蒂夫·麦奎因连续十次打着打火机……
Now, if Steve McQueen lights his cigarette lighter ten times in a row,
他就赢走彼得·罗伦的车
he wins Peter Lorre’s new car.
但如果他没能连续十次打着打火机……
But if he does not light his cigarette lighter ten times in a row,
彼得·罗伦就切掉斯蒂夫·麦奎因的小指头
Peter Lorre gets to chop off Steve McQueen’s little pinky.
诺曼和切斯特在这里也打了同样的赌
Norman and Chester here just made that same bet.
诺曼以他的小指头……
Norman has bet his pinky…
赌他能连续打着十次打火机
that he can light his cigarette lighter ten times in a row.
如果他成功了……
If he does,
他就赢下切斯特的196♥4♥年雪佛兰……
he wins Chester’s 196♥4♥ Chevy Chevelle…
红色、漂亮的车
red, fuckin’, beautiful car.
反之……就切掉他的小指头。你怎么说?
If he doesn’t, chop off his fuckin’ pinky. What do you say?
你们都喝醉了
You guys are drunk.
– 对!
– 当然!当然我们醉了!
– Yes!
– Of course! Of course we’re drunk!
泰德,这就是我们在这里的原因,但不意味着……
Teddy, that’s why we’re here, but that does not mean…
我们不知道我们在说什么
that we don’t know what the fuck we’re talking about.
我要告诉你我在说什么
I’m gonna tell you what the fuck I’m talkin’ about.
我要告诉你我在说什么
I’m gonna tell you what the fuck I’m talkin’ about.
我开的只是我姐姐卖♥♥给我的本♥田♥二手车
I drive a motherfucking Honda that my sister sold me.
你听到我说的了吗?一辆小小的狗♥日♥的♥本♥田♥思域!
You hear what I’m saying? A little white motherfuckin’ Honda Civic!
你看到这垃圾了吗?
You see this shit?
– “好莱坞最红的新星……”
– 就是我
– “Hollywood’s hottest new star…
– That’s me.
“站在美国最受欢迎的古董车旁边”
“next to America’s hottest old car.”
– 那车是我的
– 你听清楚我的话了吗?清楚没有?
– That’s the car I own.
– Are you listenin’ to me? Are you?
天杀的!你在听我说吗?
Goddamn shit! Are you listening to me?
你现在好好看一眼那辆车……
Now you take a good long look at that there machine…
那个混♥蛋♥身旁的那辆车
that this motherfucker over here’s standin’ next to.
那是辆196♥4♥年暗红色敞篷雪佛兰
That’s a 196♥4♥ nigger-red, ragtop Chevy Chevelle.
我爱这车子甚于爱屁♥股♥、嘴唇或指尖
And I love that car more than I love hips, lips or fingertips.
我们在这庆祝新年,喝高了……
Cut to: We’re sittin’ here celebratin’, gettin’ high,
– 喝香槟……
– 喝水晶香槟
– drinking champagne…
– Drinking Cristal.
当你喝香槟,你是在喝香槟
When you’re drinking champagne, you’re drinking champagne.
当你喝水晶香槟,你就会说你在喝水晶香槟
When you’re drinking Cristal, you say you’re drinking Cristal.
不管这是什么,我们在喝着,你知道
Whatever that pissity-ass thing is, we are drinking it, you know.
一边看电视
– And we are watching TV.
– [ Murmurs ]
什么?什么?嘿,嘿,嘿,突然间……
What, what? Hey, hey, hey. When all of a sudden,
我们的话题就跳到斯蒂夫·麦奎因和彼特·罗伦是坏小子上
[ Tongue Clicks ] we flip on Steve McQueen, Peter Lorre being fuckin’ badasses.
– 坏小子!
– 坏小子!
– Badass!
– Badasses!
我望着这滑稽的直娘贼……
And I look over at this funny-looking motherfucker over here,
然后我说,“我也会为雪佛兰打这赌的。”
and I say, “I’d do that for the Chevelle.”
– 我很好玩
– 然后当切斯特接着说……
– I’m funny.
– And that’s when Chester says…
“哦,是吗?”
“Oh, really?”
你们真的是醉得厉害,才会做这种蠢事
Well, you guys wouldn’t be doing something this stupid unless you were really fucking drunk.
我们早说过我们醉了,泰德
We already told you we were drunk, Ted.
这还用得着说嘛
That goes without motherfucking saying.
因为要不是醉了,我们就可能没胆子做了
‘Cause if we wasn’t drunk, we’d probably chicken out.
醉了才会口吐真言
When you’re fucked up, you don’t lie.
伙计,你说出了真♥相♥
Man, you tell the fuckin’ truth.
你想知道真♥相♥是什么吗?
You want to know what the fuckin’ truth is?
真♥相♥是,我的幸运的Zippo打火机会帮我赢下……
The fuckin’ truth is, my lucky Zippo is gonna win me…
切斯特的车
Chester’s fucking car.
而这赌注我们要拉你参加,泰德
Which brings us to your part in this little wager, Ted.
这跟我无关啊,先生
I don’t have a part, sir.
[ Norman, Chester Laughing ]
正是这样。正如我爷爷过去常说的……
That’s it. Like my old granddaddy used to always say,
“凡事不可把话说得太满……
“The less a man makes declarative statements,
“话越少就越不会像个笨蛋”
“the less apt he is to look foolish in retrospect.”
– 真是名言,先生
– 啊,谢谢,谢谢,谢谢
– That’s quite brilliant, sir.
– Ah, thank you, thank you, thank you.
问题是,这个任务中有某种内在的障碍
Thing is, there are some inherent obstacles in this undertaking.
除了明显的区别
Aside from the obvious.
首先一个事实是我不像电视里的彼得·罗伦
First of which is being the fact that I’m not like Peter Lorre on that TV show.
我不是什么喜欢全国旅行收集手指头的变♥态♥
I’m not some sick fuck travelin’ the countryside collecting fingers.
好吧,你知道,我们都是老朋友了
All right, you know, we’re all buddies here.
没人希望诺曼失去手指头,我们只不过是想把它切下来
No one wants Norman to lose his finger. We just want to chop it off.

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