蒙蒂·派松和圣杯（1975）

Then you shall die.
我作为不列颠人的国王命令你 给我让开!
I command you, as King of the Britons, to stand aside.
谁也不能叫我让开
I move for no man.
好罢!
So be it!
可敬的对手 你让开吧
Now, stand aside, worthy adversary.
-这只是挠痒痒 -挠痒痒? 你的胳膊掉了
-‘Tis but a scratch. -“A scratch”? Your arm’s off.
-不 这不是 -那是什么呢?
-No, it isn’t. -Well, what’s that, then?
-我的情况越来越糟了 -你这个骗子!
-I’ve had worse. -You liar.
算了吧 你这个娘娘腔!
Come on, you pansy!
我赢了
Victory is mine.
仁慈的主啊 谢谢你…
We thank thee, Lord, that in thy…
-来呀 -什么?
-Come on, then. -What?
我要揍你!
Have at you.
你确实很勇敢 但是我赢了
You are brave, Sir Knight, but the fight is mine.
哦 你受够了 不是吗?
Had enough, eh?
你看看 你这个蠢货 你没有胳膊了
Look, you stupid bastard. You’ve got no arms left.
-不 我有 -你看!
-Yes, I have. -Look!
这只是皮肉之伤
Just a flesh wound.
-别打了! -胆小鬼!
-Look, stop that. -Chicken!
我要砍下你的腿! 右腿!
I’ll have your leg. Right!
-好呀! 我也要砍掉你的腿 -你要干什么?
-Right! I’ll do you for that. -You’ll what?
-过来 -你要干什么 放我的血?
-Come here. -What are you going to do? Bleed on me?
-我是不可战胜的! -你疯了
-I am invincible! -You’re a loony.
黑武士是无往不胜的!
The Black Knight always triumphs. Have at you!
我要揍你! 来呀
Come on, then.
好的 我们打了个平手
All right, we’ll call it a draw.
-帕特斯 走吧 -哦 哦 我看到了
-Come, Patsy. -Oh, I see.
你逃跑了 不是吗? 你这个黄衣服的杂种!
Running away? You yellow bastard!
回来受死吧! 我要把你的腿咬掉!
Come back here and take what’s coming to you! I’ll bite your legs off!
耶稣仁慈的主
Pie Jesu Domine
赐他们安息吧
Dona eis requiem
耶稣仁慈的主
Pie Jesu Domine
赐他们安息吧
Dona eis requiem
-女巫! -我们找到了一个女巫!
-A witch! -We found a witch.
-我们抓到一个女巫! -我们找到了一个女巫!
-We got a witch. -We found a witch.
我们抓到一个女巫!
We’ve got a witch.
烧死她!
Burn her!
我们找到了一个女巫 我们能把她烧死吗?
We have found a witch. May we burn her?
烧死她!
Burn her!
-你怎么知道他是女巫? -她看上去像个女巫
-How do you know she is a witch? -She looks like one.
把她带过来
Bring her forward.
-我不是女巫! -但你的装束像女巫
-I am not a witch. -But you are dressed as one.
-是他们把我打扮成这样的 -不 我们没有
-They dressed me up like this. -We didn’t!
这不是我的鼻子 这是个假鼻子
And this isn’t my nose. It’s a false one.
-什么? -我们做了这个鼻子
-Well? -Well, we did do the nose.
-鼻子? -还有帽子 但她是个女巫!
-The nose? -And the hat. But she is a witch.
烧死她!
Burn her!
是你们把她打扮成这样的?
Did you dress her up like this?
没有… 没有… 没有
No. Yes.
是的… 是的 稍微打扮了一下 她让人讨厌
Yes, a bit. She has got a wart.
为什么你们认为她是个女巫?
What makes you think she is a witch?
他把我变成了一只蝾螈!
Well, she turned me into a newt.
一只蝾螈?
A newt?
我变回来了
I got better.
-总之要烧死她! -烧死她!
-Burn her anyway. -Burn her!
安静! 安静! 有很多分辨女巫的方法
Quiet! There are ways of telling whether she is a witch.
有吗? 是哪些方法? 告诉我们
Are there? What are they? Tell us.
使用这些方法疼吗?
Do they hurt?
告诉我 你们怎么处置女巫?
Tell me, what do you do with witches?
烧死她们!
Burn them!
-除了女巫 你们还能烧什么? -更多的女巫!
-What do you burn apart from witches? -More witches!
-木头! -那么女巫为什么能烧着?
-Wood. -So, why do witches burn?
-因为他们是木头做的? -很好!
-‘Cause they’re made of wood? -Good.
我们怎么知道她是木头做的?
So, how do we tell whether she is made of wood?
-把她造成一座桥 -但是石头也可以造桥呀?
-Build a bridge out of her. -Can you not also make bridges of stone?
噢 是的
Oh, yeah.
木头沉到水里吗?
Does wood sink in water?
-不 -木头漂在水上
-No. -It floats.
把她扔到池塘里!
Throw her into the pond!
-还有什么东西可以漂在水上? -面包
-What also floats in water? -Bread.
-苹果 -很小的石头
-Apples. -Very small rocks.
-苹果汁! 肉汤
-Cider. Cherries. -Gravy. Mud.
-樱桃 泥巴 -石墨
-Churches. -Lead.
鸭子!
A duck!
正确
Exactly.
所以理所当然的
So, logically…
如果她
If she
和鸭子一样重…
weighs the same as a duck…
她就是木头做的
She’s made of wood.
所以?
And, therefore…
-她就是女巫! -女巫!
-A witch! -A witch!
我们应该用我最大的天平
We shall use my largest scales.
好的! 移走支撑物!
Right. Remove the supports!
-她是女巫! -女巫!
-A witch! -A witch!
-真是个公正的警♥察♥ -烧死她!
-It’s a fair cop. -Burn her!
你是谁 怎么知道这么科学的方法?
Who are you, who are so wise in the ways of science?
-我是不列颠人的国王亚瑟 -我的陛下!
-I am Arthur, King of the Britons. -My liege.
尊贵的骑士 你愿意和我一起去卡米洛特
Good Sir Knight, will you come to Camelot,
成为一名圆桌骑士吗?
and join us at the Round Table?
我的陛下 这是我的荣誉!
My liege, I would be honored.
-你叫什么名字? -我的陛下 我叫彼德维热
-What is your name? -Bedevere, my liege.
我授予你 彼德维热爵士
Then I dub you Sir Bedevere,
圆桌骑士的称号♥
knight of the Round Table.
智慧之士彼德维热爵士 是亚瑟王的第一个骑士
The wise Sir Bedevere was the first to join King Arthur’s knights.
其它光辉的名字也鱼贯而出
But other illustrious names were soon to follow.
勇敢之士兰斯洛特爵士
Sir Lancelot the Brave.
圣洁之士加拉哈德爵士
Sir Galahad the Pure.
以及不如兰斯洛特爵士那么勇敢的罗宾爵士
And Sir Robin, the Not-quite-so-brave-as-Sir-Lancelot,
他差一点和安格那之龙战斗
who had nearly fought the Dragon of Angnor,
差一点和布里斯托尔之鸡对抗
who had nearly stood up to the vicious Chicken of Bristol,
还在班顿山之战中把自己搞成了落汤鸡
and who had personally wet himself at the Battle of Badon Hill.
还有那个爵士的名号♥也没有出现在影片中
And the aptly named Sir Not-appearing-in-this-film.
他们一起组成了一个名字和功绩
Together they formed a band
流传了几个世纪的团体!
whose names and deeds were to be retold throughout the centuries.
圆桌骑士
The Knights of the Round Table.
那么 我的陛下 我们是怎么知道地球的形状像个香蕉
That, my liege, is how we know the Earth to be banana-shaped.
彼德维热爵士 这门新的知识让我困惑
This new learning amazes me, Sir Bedevere.
再解释一下 羊尿泡是如何用来预报地震的
Explain again how sheep’s bladders may be employed to prevent earthquakes.
-陛下 是的 -我的陛下 您看!
-Certainly, sir. -Look, my liege.
-卡米洛特! -卡米洛特!
-Camelot. -Camelot.
-卡米洛特! -这只是个拍电影用的模型
-Camelot. -It’s only a model.
骑士们 恭喜你们来到新家
Knights, I bid you welcome to your new home.
让我们骑进卡米洛特吧!
Let us ride to Camelot!
我们是圆桌骑士 我们一有机会就跳舞
We’re knights of the Round Table We dance whene’er we’re able
我们迈着整齐划一的步伐 去工作 去赞美上帝
We do routines and chorus scenes With footwork impeccable
我们在卡米洛特大块朵颐 无数的火腿
We dine well here in Camelot We eat ham
果酱和午餐肉吃得不亦乐乎
and jam and Spam a lot
我们是圆桌骑士 我们的表现令人敬畏
We’re knights of the Round Table Our shows are formidable
但是很多次派给我们的诗歌♥ 却无法歌♥唱
But many times We’re given rhymes
我们在卡米洛特疯狂的歌♥唱 发自内心地歌♥唱
That are quite unsingable We’re opera mad in Camelot
我们顽强和勇猛地战斗 而且不知疲倦
We sing from the diaphragm a lot
在任务的间隙
In war we’re tough and able
我们穿上闪光背心
Quite indefatigable
模仿克拉克·盖博
Between our quests We sequin vests
在卡米洛特真是忙碌
And impersonate Clark Gable It’s a busy life in Camelot
我得推一大堆婴儿车
I have to push the pram a lot
考虑再三 还是别去卡米洛特 它是个无聊的地方
No, on second thoughts, let’s not go to Camelot. It is a silly place.
对
Right.
亚瑟! 亚瑟!
Arthur.
不列颠人的国王!
King of the Britons.
不要跪拜 我承受不起的就是人♥民♥的跪拜