假期历险记

And, Dad, no offense, but I just don’t wanna do my first big road trip…
我不想去商业化的主题公园
to some corporate theme park, you know?
我想探索地道的美国 深入文化 追寻自♥由♥
I’d like to explore the real America, like, uh, Jack Kerouac or the Merry Pranksters.
-别扯怪异的事 -嗷
-Don’t say weird shit! -Aw!
凯文 别欺负
Kevin! Bullying!
别扫兴 我小时候去哇哩乐园是我最快乐的时刻
Guys, come on. My trip to Walley World when I was a kid was the best time I ever had.
所以你就想重温30年前的假期
So you just wanna redo your vacation from 30 years ago?
你不觉得那样有点倒胃口
Don’t you think that’s gonna be kind of a letdown?
不 不 这不是重温 这次会截然不同
No, no, no, no. We’re not redoing anything. This will be completely different.
首先 我以前的假期是一儿一女
For one thing, the original vacation had a boy and a girl.
这次是两个儿子
This one has two boys.
我保证还有许多其他的不同
And I’m sure that there will be lots of other differences.
我连原版的假期都没听过
I’ve never even heard of the original vacation.
无所谓 这是全新的假期 好吗
Doesn’t matter. The new vacation will stand on its own. Okay?
拜托 老婆 你怎么说
Come on, honey. What do you say?
我们可以开车去 坐飞机回来
We can drive out and fly back.
管它的 再烂也强过那愚蠢的小屋 对吧 宝贝
Oh, what the heck. It couldn’t be as bad as that stupid cabin, right, honey?
-精神可嘉 -好
-That’s the spirit. -All right.
真衰
Fuck me.
爸 我们要一路开你的那辆小车吗
Are we gonna drive all that way in your little car, Dad?
不是
Not exactly.
-拜托你们 -什么
-Come on, guys. -What?
你们刚才怎么没跟上来
How come you didn’t follow me just then?
-你要我们跟出去 -对 所以我才摇钥匙
-Oh. You wanted us to? -Yeah. That’s why I dangled the key like that.
-哦原来… -不然我♥干♥嘛那样
-Oh, well, I don’t… -Why else would I…?
你就直说”跟我来”
You could have just said, “come with me.”
瞧老爸租了什么
Look what your Dad rented.
那是什么鬼东西
What the hell is that?
凯文
Kevin.
是2015年蛋塔节能车
That’s a 2015 Tartan Prancer.
亲爱的 你是说”蛋塔”
Did you say “Tartan,” honey?
对 蛋塔号♥称阿尔巴尼亚的本♥田♥
Yeah. Tartan’s the Honda of Albania.
爸 你干嘛租辆阿尔巴尼亚的车
Why’d you get an Albanian car, Dad?
纪念日周末假期租车…
Well, it turns out renting a family car on Memorial Day weekend…
你没多少选择
doesn’t leave you with a lot of options.
但这宝贝很炫
But this baby is pretty sweet.
具备阿尔巴尼亚的所有最新科技
It’s got all the latest Albanian technology.
看过来 插电式混合动力
Check it out. Plug-in hybrid.
哇 环保 很好
Oh, wow. Eco-friendly. Good.
只要没油时 就能停下来插上充电
So any time we run outta juice, we can just pull right over, and… plug in.
我不知道这是什么
I don’t… I don’t know what that is.
从没见过那种插头
Never seen an outlet for that.
会自动收线吧 还是…
Should it retract, or…
-你以为会自动收线可是… -哦
-You would think it would retract. It just… -Huh.
不会
If it just… No, it doesn’t. It’s… Yeah.
杯架
Cup holder?
我觉得可以卷起来 就这样卷回去
I think you coil it. I think you just coil it like that.
对吧 然后关起来
Right? And then you close it right up.
没关系 我们还有2个油箱
Doesn’t matter. We’ve still got two gas tanks.
-为什么２个 -能装２倍的油
-Why two? -Carry twice as much gas.
-干嘛不用一个大油箱就好 -就是２倍的油
-Why not just have one big tank? -It’s twice the gas, buddy.
2个小的加起来一样呀
Actually the same volume.
-两个小的… -嘘…
-Two small… -Shh.
有6个烟灰缸
It has six ashtrays.
6个 哇
Six. Wow.
希望你们烟抽个爽
Hope you guys like Smokin’!
-对吧 -是 -是
-Right? -Yeah. -Yeah.
怎么一堆镜子
What’s with all the mirrors?
更安全
Safer.
-可是… -对了
-But… -Oh!
这很牛 我能用遥控钥匙控制整辆车
And this is amazing. I can control the entire car from the fob.
-这些按键是干嘛 -不知道 但我们会弄懂
-What do all the buttons mean? -No clue. But we’ll figure it out.
老公 那是纳粹党徽吗
Honey, is that… Is that a swastika on there?
对 我们用不到它的
Yeah. We won’t use that.
我最爱的功能来了
This is my favorite part.
-用门甩我的手臂 -什么
-Slam the door on my arm. -What?
它有感应器 让你不会在关门时夹到手或脚
It has a sensor. It won’t let you slam the door on your arm or leg.
-老公我可不会这么干 -租车员示范过 别怕
-Honey, I’m not doing that. -The rental guy showed me. Just do it.
-好吧 -做吧
-Okay. -Do it!
-做吧 -这挺好玩
-Do it. -Kinda fun.
-用力甩 -好
-Slam it. -All right.
我要甩了
I’m doing it.
-我的妈呀我的妈呀 -噢 痛死了
-Oh, my gosh! Oh, my gosh! -Ohh. God damn it!
我的天 你干嘛逼我那样做
Oh, my God! Why did you have me do that?
噢
Ohh.
噢 喔 我还没激活感应器
Oh. Oh, I didn’t have the sensor activated.
-好吧 -我是白♥痴♥
-Okay. -I’m an idiot.
-再来一次 -不 打死也不
-Do it again. -No! Absolutely not.
-来吧没问题的我刚启动了感应器 -不 我不干
-Come on. It’ll be fine. I just activated it. -No, I’m not gonna do it.
别胆小鬼
Don’t be chicken.
好
Fine!
-啊噢 -啊
-Aah! Ow! -Aah!
妈的
Shit!
-你干嘛这么干 -没搞错
-Why did you do that? -Really?
你是对的 对不起
You’re right. I’m sorry.
噢 谁都别玩甩门夹手了 好吗
Ohh. Nobody slam their arm in the door, okay?
我能夹詹姆斯的蛋蛋吗
Can I slam it on James’ balls?
-所以你承认我有蛋蛋 -对 挂在你的阴♥道♥外面
-So you admit I have balls? -Yeah, they hang outta your vagina.
-你们两个别吵了 -快点 大家 要吵有的是时间
-Okay, you two stop that. Please. -Guys, come on. There’s plenty of time for that.
快去打包行李 我们今天上路
Go on and get packed. We’re hittin’ the road today.
好
Okay.
看来今天要出发 快去准备
Guess we’re leaving today. Phew! All right. Let’s go, guys.
啊
Ah.
嘿 儿子 那是什么
Hey, honey. What’s all that?
这是我的梦想日志…
Well, this is my dream journal,
奇想笔记…
whimsy log,
愿望日记 我的诗集
wish diary, my poems.
还有这屌♥玩意会成为意识流的旅行志 所以…
And this bad boy is going to be a stream of consciousness travel log, so…
对
Yeah.
放心啦 这年纪的男孩都有一堆日记
Come on, honey, every boy that age has a stack of diaries.
好 大伙儿
Okay, gang.
系上安全带
Seat belts on!
两个油箱加满油 老婆 GPS设定了
Two full tanks of gas! Honey, GPS check?
是的 是的 收到
Yes. Yes. Roger that.
路线安排 哇哩乐园
好了
Okay.
您的目的地距离2560英里
Your destination is 2,560 miles ahead.
哇哩乐园 我们来了
Walley world, here we come.
我以后都只会点头 我从来没如此熟练的握手
I’ll just not, i’ve never been so good at shaking hands
芝加哥
我住在一个火球冰冻的表面上
I live on the frozen surface of a fireball
在这里 不同国家的人们聚集在一起
Where cities come together
瑞格利球场 芝加哥小熊队之家
以体育的名义相互讨厌
to hate each other in the name of sport
我们快没油了
Well, we’re almost out of gas.
什么 这怎么可能 才开了不到一小时
What? How is that possible? We’ve been driving for less than an hour.
原谅他们吧 即使他们没意识到自己错了
Forgive them, even if they are not sorry
贪心的人们在不远处窥视
All the vulture, bootleggers at the door waiting
密苏里州
嘿 爸 哇哩乐园到底有什么特别
Hey, Dad, what’s so special about Walley World?
我的意思是 家附近就有很多主题乐园
I mean, we have plenty of theme parks at home.
这个嘛 哇哩乐园有独一无二的”迅猛龙”
Well, Walley World is home of the one and only Velociraptor.
那是什么鬼东西
What the hell is that?
就是全国最新颖 最可怕的云霄飞车
It’s only the newest, scariest roller coaster in the country.
450英尺高 时速110英里…
450 feet tall, 110 miles an hour,
3圈螺旋轨道
triple corkscrew loop.
对 嘿 看后面
Yeah. Oh, hey! Look at this!
看来我们形成了一个小车队
Looks like we got ourselves a little old convoy.
咱们来打个招呼
Let’s say “Hi”.
我的天 附带无线电
Oh, my goodness. It has a CD Radio in it?
对 这款车的标准配备
Yeah. Comes standard in all prancers.
-这样就能跟卡车司机对话 -好吧
-This way we can talk to truckers. -Okay.
现在 大伙儿 要说他们的行话