我不明白这份请♥愿♥书上写的是什么
I don’t quite understand what this petition’s about.
是关于动物的可以吗?
Animals?
还有你的e-mail地址
And your e-mail address.
你不会是想给我发垃圾邮件吧 是吗? 哦 不 不…
You won’t send me any spam, will you? Oh, no, no, no, no.
带星号♥的
Asterisk.
你收到了垃圾邮件
You’ve got spam.
垃圾 垃圾 都是垃圾
Spam, spam, junk.
最后一头侏儒犀牛要死了?
The very last pygmy rhino is going extinct?
除非能有我的信♥用♥卡♥号♥
Unless it gets my credit card number?
垃圾 垃圾
Spam. Spam.
“嗨 你好吗?” 一定是基菲
“Hi. How are you?” Oh, that must be from Kiffy.
嗨 你好吗?
Hi, how are you?
超低价抛售勃起障碍药物
Low, low prices on erectile dysfunction remedies,
安♥眠♥药♥ 老人用药 以及抗抑郁药
sleeping pills, old-person drugs, and antidepressants.
抗抑郁药?
Antidepressants?
我当然不想得抑郁症了
Well, I certainly don’t want to get depressed.
请输入您的信♥用♥卡♥卡♥号♥♥
Please enter credit card number.
用现金可以吗?
Is cash okay?
黄♥片♥ 黄♥片♥ 免费黄♥片♥
Porn. Porn. Free porn.
看黄♥片♥也赚钱
Get RICH Watching Porn!
真是难以置信
I find that rather hard to believe.
西约翰逊黄家学院的教兽们
Scientists at west Johnson Porniversity
对上等机器女♥优♥品质进行测试
need research subjects to rate top-quality roborotica
“上等女♥优♥”
“Top-quality.”
警告! 要扫描病毒吗?
Warning! Perform virus scan?
我还要看黄♥片♥呢
I’m waiting for porn over here.
来吧 宝贝
Oh, yeah, come on, baby.
病毒下载完毕
朋友们 朋友们!
Friends, friends!
尼日利亚的阿迪萨拉基 O·佐艾伯格王子死了
His Majesty Prince Adisaraki O. Zoidberg of Nigeria died.
我很难过
That’s so sad.
我的抗抑郁药什么时候才能到啊?
When will those antidepressants get here?
且慢 还没完
Wait, there’s more.
根据这封e-mail 我佐艾伯格 作为他的近亲
According to this e-mail, I, Zoidberg, am his next of kin.
一旦我汇些钱给一个国外银行帐户以表哀悼
Once I wire some good-faith money to an overseas bank account,
我就可以继承他的王位 他的小舟 和他那丰满的妻子
I’ll inherit his kingdom, his canoe, and his plump young wife.
你这个白♥痴♥ 不知道这是在骗你吗?
You dumb stumps. Don’t you realize you’re being scammed?
你人品也太差了点 赫米斯
That is low, Hermes.
自己没有身体
Just because you don’t have a body,
就不想让别人当尼日利亚王子
you don’t want anyone else to be prince of Nigeria.
没人可以阻止我汇这笔钱
Well, try and stop me from wiring that money.
你们在干什么?
What’s going on here?
我的非法登入监控软件
According to my illegal key logging software,
发现你们都在互联网上泄露私人信息
you’ve all been giving out personal information over the Internet.
要是赫米斯在 你们都会被解雇
If Hermes were here, he’d fire you all.
我在 你闭嘴
I am here. Quiet, you.
既然他不在 我来召开一个紧急安全会议
In his absence, I’m calling a mandatory company security seminar.
去指挥室!
To the mandatorium!
要识别网络上的虚假信息并不难
Now, it’s not hard to spot a phony Internet come-on.
“快速致富” 假的
“Get rich quick x7 q”? Phony.
“吃空间寄生植物减肥”? 假的
“Lose weight with space parasites”? Phony.
这是什么? 我赢了西班牙全国彩票?
What’s this? I’ve won the Spanish National Lottery?
不 是骗人的!
No, it’s a scam!
是啊 是啊 骗局 天哪 我发财了!
Yes, yes, a scam. My goodness, I’m rich!
差点忘了以前买♥♥过一张彩票
And to think I didn’t even know I had a ticket.
只要汇点保证金过去就能拿到奖金了
I just need to wire some collateral to collect the winnings.
住手 教授! 你在泄露私人信息
Professor, stop! You’re giving away personal information!
泄露任何东西都无所谓 我赢了西班牙全国彩票
I can afford to give away anything I want. I’ve won the Spanish National Lottery.
不 住手! 是个骗局!
No, don’t! It’s a scam!
为什么没人肯听我?
Why won’t anybody listen to me?
我妈妈的姓 她的银行账号♥
And my mother’s maiden name and her bank account numbers and…
好了!
There!
我发财了 发财了 发财了!
I’m rich. Rich. Rich!
我的400美元到了
That must be my $400 now.
你好 或许我该说”早上好(西班牙语)”?
Hello. Or should I say, “Buenos dias”?
嗨 你的公♥司♥是我们的了
Hi. We own your company now.
我来对付这些人
I’ll deal with these guys.
欢迎 老板
Welcome, boss.
真是没想到
Guess I was wrong.
还真有机器人会傻到下载服从病毒
There was a robot stupid enough to download the obedience virus.
那就是我 恭喜发财 白♥痴♥们
I sure was Make a hole, chumps
欢迎我们的新主人!
Presenting our new masters!
我该把这些拨号♥盘放在那里 我的主人?
Where shall I put these auto-dialers, kind master?
放在密♥码♥机跟垃圾邮件弹射装置之间
Between the password crank and the spamjaculator.
都快点! 我们有一整个星球要骗
Come on! We’ve got a whole planet to scam.
再给我拿些橡胶菌来!
And bring me some more Gummi Fungus!
我们不能任由这个卑鄙小人使唤
We don’t have to stand here and take abuse from a gross nerd.
对! 对!
Yeah! Yeah!
都回去干活 你们这些傻瓜
Now get back to work, you turkeys.
星际快递仍在营业之中
Planet Express is still in business.
我们还有一堆所谓的货物要送呢
We’ve got crap loads of quote-unquote merchandise to deliver
去送货吧 陛下
Ship them out, Your Highness.
终于受到了尊重
Finally, some respect.
我觉得好些了
I feel a little better.
我们被这些巨骗给忽悠了 是吗?
Those marvelous scammers sure scammed us, huh?
你怎么能袖手旁观 还去拍外星人马匹?
How can you just sit there kissing the aliens’ butt flaps?
你不知道自己完全被控制了吗?
Don’t you realize you are totally under their control?
当然知道 但这样不可以吗?
Of course I realize it. Does that mean I can’t enjoy it?
小子 我们都是笨蛋
Boy, were we suckers.
你们好 凡人们
Greetings, earthlings.
万岁 英俊的拉尔斯带着他的神奇罐子来了
Oh, hooray. It’s handsome Lars and his fabulous jars.
你们好 莉拉外的所有人
Hello, everyone who isn’t Leela.
再对那个人致以特别的问候
And a special hello to everyone else.
别扯淡了 快谈正事
Shut your lockers and get to class
我的身体怎么样了? 哦 恐怕得耽搁了
How’s my body doing? Oh, I’m afraid it’s behind schedule.
陈列馆被一个叫
The museum got tricked into giving all its funding
诈骗科学会的组织骗走了所有资金
to something called the Scamming Sciences Institute.
是捏造出来的
It’s a fake place.
言归正传 秃子 我什么时候才能要回身体?
Cut to the chase, baldy. When do I get my me back?
可能几个月 也可能几年
Well, it could be months, or even years.
不! 身体是我婚姻的本钱
No! That body’s the cornerstone of my marriage.
勒芭芭拉会怎么办?
What’s LaBarbara going to do?
去找她那首任丈夫
She’s going to go back to her first husband.
巴巴多斯·斯林? 我喜欢那家伙
Barbados Slim? I love that guy.
人人都喜欢斯林
Everybody loves Slim.
他是唯一一个赢了奥♥运♥
He’s the only man to ever win Olympic gold medals
钻竹竿和做♥爱♥两项金牌的家伙
in both limbo and sex
也许我得走了
Well, maybe I should get going.
好啊 我送你走 不 莉拉送他走
Yes, I’ll show you out. No, Leela will show him out.
是啊 莉拉送你走
No, Leela will show you out.
我 莉拉
Me. Leela.
你那个朋友 弗莱 看上去不错
So your friend, Fry, seems nice.
你们俩在交往吗? 没有
Are you and he dating? Nope.
那好 我正想约你出去吃饭
Good, because I was maybe thinking of asking you out for dinner.
我是不是该回答”没问题 什么时间?”
I’ll start maybe thinking about saying, “Sure, when?”
让我装作要考虑一下
Let me maybe give it some thought.
明晚8点? 好的
Tomorrow at 8:00? Okay.
这不公平 到未来世界的第一天我就爱上了莉拉
It’s no fair. I’ve loved Leela since the day I came to the future.
你看过我用通心粉为她做的情人节礼物吗?
Did I show you the macaroni valentine I made for her?
看过
Yes.
再看看
Look at it again.
我知道她觉得我不够成熟 可总有一天我会变的
I know she thinks I’m immature, but someday I won’t be.
而且我深知 我们两个会走到一起
And deep down in my heart, I know we’ll end up together.
全都表达在这通心粉里了
It’s all there in the macaroni.
拉尔斯约我了
Lars asked me out.
伟大的主人们 你们在做什么? 嗅信息
What are you doing, wonderful masters? Sprunjing for information.
哦! 这儿有东西 我嗅到了
Oh! There’s something here. I can sprunje it.
机器人 把这弄开!
Robot, tear it open!
遵命 遵命…
Goody, goody, goody, goody!
你脖子上那东西是什么? 你说我的嗅觉器官 呃?
What’s that thing on your neck? Checking out my sprunjer, huh?
是吧 有什么用处?