飞出个未来大电影1：班德大行动（2007）

Dog-danged scammers used our money to build
远程控制舰队 立体黄金死亡星球
a fleet of remote-controlled, solid-gold Death Stars.
噢 我要用红辣椒炸掉其中一个
Ooh! I’d take one of those with a side of chili fries.
我们没有武器 没救了
We’re hopelessly outgunned.
我们有军队 但只有军队
The force is with us, but that’s about it.
但我们有办法进入一个大工厂
But we have access to a huge manufacturing complex.
我旅行回来带回了爱恶作剧的孩子
I brought the elves back from vacation
把他们锁在一起 并叫上了一起渡假的朋友
Chained them up and called my holiday friends
科万滋博
Kwanzabot
还有我 光明僵尸
And the Chanukah zombie
三个疯狂的智者 肩负着谋杀和涂满了乳香
Three mad, wise men Bearing murder and frankincense
见鬼 闭嘴
Damn you Shut up
把兔子抱过来
Now fetch those bunnies by the armful
谁在说话? 我说的
Says who? Says me
凝固气油弹使他们更具危险性
Napalm makes them slightly more harmful
谁都不准逃跑
No one here goes near that door
玩具店打算参战
This toyshop’s going to war
《塔木德经》说”先别生气”
Talmud says “Be slow to anger”
卑贱的骗子让我发怒
Low-down scammers got me seeing red
把我的TIE驶出飞机棚
Got my TIE fighter out of the hangar
闪开 小鬼 ‘我是犹太人有着不死之躯
Jump back, Jack ‘Cause I’m Jewish and I’m undead
遵命!
Ten hut!
陀螺 陀螺 我用粘土把它制成
I made it out of blasting clay
你胡说
You’re nuts
当它变干 准备行使它的任务时
And when it’s dry and ready For mercy they will pay
我再也不能再等八个晚上或者更多了
I can’t wait eight nights or more
僵尸想参战
This zombie’s going to war
检查 检查 科万滋博
Check, check it out Kwanzabot in the Neptizzle-hizzle
用我野蛮的敲击盒 不停地制♥造♥导弹
With my inhuman beat box Busy building missiles
由这些跳舞的精灵带头
They’re guided by these cute dancing fairy figures
小心 小矮人 靠近它就会触发爆♥炸♥
Careful, little elf That’s proximity-triggered
我为科万滋作战 孩子们就不会错过
I’m fighting back for Kwanza So the children won’t miss it
我对此事的价值还很困惑 但是当我们成功时
I’m confused about its meaning But I know it when they dis it
所以 圣诞老人 是的 科
So, Santa Yeah, K?
僵尸? 嘿 嘿
Cz? Hey, hey
我们来剥他们的皮 加油 驾上我的雪撬
Let’s slay them pimps Come on, pimp my sleigh
小心对待那些玩具炮
Easy with that toy artillery
多哥牌粉末是致命的 但不稳定
Torgo’s powder’s deadly but unstable
他们会控告吗? 当然不会!
Can they sue for liability? Certainly not!
想怎么用就怎么用
Use as much as you are able
这不公平
This bites
你们受雇的时候就签字放弃了自己的权力
You signed away your rights when you were hired
现在 我们开始战斗 开始战斗
Now, let’s fight Let’s fight
好!
Okay!
烤栗子 准备开火
Chestnuts roasting, I’m gonna open fire
准备好足够的血块
Prepare for gore galore
这个三人组开始进入战斗状态
This trinity’s going to war
军队 已经配备
Troops, you are now equipped
由”魔法精灵”能制♥造♥的最精良武器
with the finest weapons magical elves can build.
关于作战计划…
As for the battle plan…
现在 讲一下作战计划 扎帕·布郎宁根将军!
And now, to present the battle plan, Commander Zapp Brannigan!
什么?
What?
放松 大伙
At ease, people.
我刚才在重新装♥修♥自己的秘密住所
I was redecorating my undisclosed location,
突然收到即将发动英雄般入侵的命令
when I received word of an heroic invasion.
看在上帝的份上 蹲下 科夫 掩护我的大腿不受寒冷侵蚀
Kif, crouch down and shield my thighs from the cold, for God’s sake.
我们参战并不是为了自己
We fight this battle, not for ourselves,
而是为了我们的孩子 孩子的孩子
but for our children and our children’s children.
这也是我组成孩子兵团的原因
Which is why I’m forming a children’s brigade.
下面的年轻人 上前一步
Will the following youths please step forward?
库比特·法兹沃斯
Cubert Farnsworth.
这儿 长官 我的孩子 噢 天哪 不!
Here, sir! My boy. Oh, God, no!
德温·斯林 到
Dwight Slim. Here.
你改了他的名字 噢 上帝 不! 无论如何我都不同意
You took his name? Oh, God, no! In several ways!
假设 15个小孩能给我们争取一些时间
Assuming the 15th pile of children buys us a few seconds,
到时我们将操纵战船45
we will then execute maneuver 45.
战船44紧随其后
Followed by maneuver 44.
是46 噢 太好了!
Forty-six Oh, great.
现在 我得在一开始乘战船2返回 是1号♥
Now I have to start back at the beginning with maneuver two.One.
舰长 我们是不是可以在任意时刻停止作战
Admiral, will we stop attacking at any point
这是否也是 假冒的号♥称慈善的战争?
or is this one of those phony-baloney feel-good wars
就像为毒品发动的战争一样?
like the war on drugs?
你叫什么名字 会讲话的人? 拉尔斯·弗尔摩
What’s your name, smart mouth? Lars Fillmore.
甩掉了可爱的莉拉的家伙
The lovely Leela’s on-again, off-again paramour.
也许一个自杀任务 可以让反抗者脱离你的视线
Perhaps a suicide mission would knock the insubordination out of you.
是 是 是的
Yes, yes, yes.
我们已经接近地球 长官 谁?
We’re approaching Earth, si Who?
噢 地球 大的蓝色星球
Oh, planet Earth. The big blue velour marble.
全体听候命令
All commanders stand by.
我一发令 就准备与主电脑相连 进入作战模式
Prepare to transfer battle control to the main duper-computer on my mark!
10 9 8…
Ten, nine, eight…
有谁对我指挥有意见吗?
Does anybody mind if I take command?
不 没有
No Nos.
没 一点都不
Nah Nope.
没意见图安佳小姐 不 我没有
No, Miss Turanga No, I do not.
没有 太酷了
No It’s cool.
好吧 第一队 瞄准目标A 开火!
All right. Unit one, acquire target A and fire!
好!盯住孩子的船
Yes! Nailed the children’s ship.
10号♥队 目标H 16号♥对付K 9号♥队 9号♥队 向左
Unit 10, Target H, 16-K. Niner, niner, go left!
我说的是右边
I mean right.
55-U
55-U.
8-R, 2-V
8-R, 2-V.
成功!耍什么把戏…
Bingo! Cheating son of a…
没戏了! 我没办法协调这么多飞船
It’s hopeless! I can’t coordinate this many ships!
也许 我能帮上忙!
Perhaps I can help!
教授 你能把我的头直接和战争网络连起来吗?
Professor, can you wire my head directly into the battle grid?
我能把任何东西直接联在一起
I can wire anything directly into anything.
我是教授!
I’m the professor!
准备看一个领导的头脑是如何行动的吧
Then prepare to see a bureaucrat’s brain in action.
最后 我用致死激光挽救了地球
Finally, I get to save the Earth with deadly lasers
而没用致死幻灯片
instead of deadly slide shows.
他是冠军中的冠军!
He’s champing for a clamping!
我成功了!我救了地球 赢回了我的女人
I did it! I saved Earth and won back my woman.
对吗 女人? 噢赫米斯我之前真是太蠢了
Right, woman? Oh, Hermes I’ve been such a fool.
事实是 我结婚是看中了你性感的身体
Truth be, I married you for your sexy potato body,
但我是因为你性感的脑袋才和你在一起
but I’m staying with you for your sexy potato head.
你还没有见到我巴巴多斯·斯林 最后一招呢
You haven’t seen the last of Barbados Slim!
我们永不再见!
Now, goodbye forever.
漂亮的攻击 大便头
Nice attack, doo-doo heads.
坏消息是 我们还没出示最后一张王牌
Too bad we have one last trick up our sleeve.
我怀疑
I doubt that.
还记得这个 法兹沃斯?
Remember this, Farnsworth?
法兹沃斯? 在说我!
Farnsworth? That’s me!
我的世界末日设备!
My doomsday device!
原来是那骗子!
So it was the scammers!
他们锯掉了我的手 偷了我的世界末日设备
They sawed off my hand and stole the doomsday device.
不是他们干的
It wasn’t them.
是我 班德 干的
It was me, Bender.
超级罪犯
The master criminal!
你们看怎么办?
So what’ll it be?
无条件投降? 决不!
Unconditional surrender? Never!
还是完全毁灭? 也决不!
Or total destruction? Also never!
你们有30秒时间考虑
You have 30 seconds. Make up your minds.
决不!
Never!
大家 我很抱歉
People, I’m sorry.
你们从来没有听我说过这种话
You’ve never before heard me say those words,
甚至没有在我的私人信件里说过
or even the individual letters that make them up.
但我确实感到抱歉 带着无限的谦虚
But I am. And with a huge amount of modesty,
我真诚地乞求你们的原谅
I humbly beg your forgiveness.
闭嘴 继续看道歉
Shut up and keep looking apologized to.
哦 我的鼻子嗅到一些不好的预感