Sebastian…
这么大的文件夹?
Could it be any bigger?
海斯丁斯先生
Mr. Hastings.
郝瑞休 金…
Horatio Gold…
…校长
…headmaster.
非常高兴见到你 非常非常荣幸
So very pleased to meet you. So very, very pleased.
你好,校长 听说你要见我
Hello, sir. Heard you wanted to see me.
我是想表示欢迎
I’d like to say welcome.
[歌♥词:欢迎来到伊利里亚 欢迎,欢迎……欢迎来伊利里亚]
我叫你进来是想说声欢迎
I just wanted to have you in to say welcome.
看你过得怎么样
See how you’re doing.
好,我过得很好,知道吗? 就忙着做个男子汉
Yeah, I’m doing great, you know? Just… busy being a guy.
男子汉,是啊
Being a guy. Yeah.
来看看你的文档 塞巴斯蒂安…
Let’s take a look at your file, Sebastian. And…
好象…卡住了
Seems to be… stuck a bit.
打开了。开了
There we go. All right.
好了…
OK. Well…
好了,你完蛋了
OK, you’re busted.
你不想坐这里和校长谈话 但我不会同意的
You don’t wanna talk to the headmaster. But I won’t take no for an answer.
那坐在校长的椅子上 来,坐啊
Now, have a sit in the headmaster’s chair. Come on, have a sit.
坐下
Sit it.
那么,塞巴斯蒂安·海斯丁斯
So, Sebastian Hastings.
– 觉得校园怎样? – 很漂亮
– How do you like campus? – Beautiful.
喜不喜欢这炭黑和苹果红
You’ve been inspired by the charcoal black and candy apple red?
– 你知道啦 – 喂!
– You know it. – Hey!
别碰!永远别在碰了!
Don’t touch it. Ever. Ever. Do not do that.
知道吗,塞巴斯蒂安, 我以前也是个转校生…
You know, Sebastian, I was a transfer student myself…
…很久以前 当恐龙还徘徊在这个星球上时
…once upon a time. Back when dinosaurs roamed the earth.
所以我才会特别
So I keep a special interest
注意转入我校的转校生
in the transfer students that come to this school.
就好比…我是个大哥哥
Act as a… unofficial big brother.
当我临时冒出问候你的时候别太见怪
Don’t be surprised if I just pop in unannounced just to check up.
好,我很期待
Yeah, I look forward to it.
快滚!
Now scoot!
对不起
Sorry.
– 没关系 – 是我不对
– Don’t worry about it. – My fault.
到底是…?
What is…?
开始接触异性了是不是?
Getting to know the opposite sex, are we?
两性的对立 让人紧张的男女关系
Male-female dynamics. All that sexual tension.
高中的重要环节 继续吧,继续
It’s all part of the high school experience. So continue. Please.
但记得要注意卫生.
But keep it clean, though. OK.
矜持是重点。矜持是… 拒绝的最好方式是说不
Abstinence is key. Abstinence is… The best way to not is to not.
是的
Yes.
他一直这么友善?
Is he always that friendly?
开玩笑!他那已经算凶的了
Are you kidding? That’s him being rude.
哦,鞋子真不错
All right. Cute shoes.
你觉得? 我在安索普洛基买♥♥的
You think so? I got them at Anthropologie.
– 没门!他们也卖♥♥鞋? – 哦,是啊。就在饰品部旁边
– No way! They have shoes there? – Oh, yeah. Right by the accessories.
书给你
Here are your books.
– 谢谢 – 那,我想我该,
– Thanks. – Well, I guess I’m gonna,
你知道, 做些男人做得事
you know, go take care of some guy stuff.

OK.
给你 好好享受苹果和三明治
There you go. Have a great apple and sandwich.
嗨,我想要…
Hi! I would love a…
– 不行 – 但…
– No. – But…
嘿,同志们 我能坐吗?
Hey, dudes. Mind if I join?
谢谢
Thanks.
那足球试练太大兴了,是不是?
So those soccer tryouts were bogus, huh?
我是说,替补队员? 拜托,太荒谬了,对不对?对不对?
I mean, second string? Come on, that’s ridiculous. Am I right? Am I right?
那对康沃尔的比赛让人期待
So the game against Cornwall, that should be interesting.
为什么让人期待?
And why would that be interesting?
因为我妹妹在那儿 她之前和贾斯丁·德瑞顿
Well, my sister goes there, and she used to date that tool Justin Drayton.
我认识他
I know him.
– 我把他弄哭过一次 – 等等
– I made him cry once during a game. – Wait.
– 那次是你? – 当然
– That was you? – Absolutely.
那回太逗了
– That was so funny. – Wow.
你妹妹辣不?
Is your sister hot?
我猜吧
I guess so.
她人品很不错
She’s got a great personality.
来了
Incoming.
哦,看啊!看看那金发的亮点啊
Oh, yeah! Check out the booty on that blondie.
不许这样说她
Don’t talk about her that way.
她是你的女友?
Is that your girlfriend?
他做梦都想
He wishes.
她本来和大学生约会 但他甩了她
She was dating this college guy, but he dumped her.
听说她现正乱着 非常脆弱
I hear she’s a total mess now, really vulnerable.
自信,自尊都失去了
Confidence, self-esteem is way down.
– 作为男人,现该出手了 – 没错
– In man words, it’s time to pounce. – Exactly.
我讨厌那家伙
I hate that guy.
你知道这腊肠的38%是蹄膀肉?
Did you know bologna is 38 percent hoof?
谢谢,麦尔肯姆
Thanks, Malcolm.
看上去你有个情敌啊
Looks like you got some competition.
– 他是麦尔肯姆 – 油腔滑调的
– It’s just Malcolm. – Total geek.
她看上去好伤心 让人心碎
She looks so sad. It’s heartbreaking.
只…只是… 我会联想,知道吗?
It… it’s just… I can relate, you know?
我是说,我也刚结束一段感情
I mean, I just got out of a bad relationship too.
我指,你以为你了解那个人
I mean, you think you know someone.
但最后却发现一切都是谎言
And you realize it’s all been a big lie.
每次抚摸
Every touch.
每次亲吻
Every kiss.
还有,你们清楚 女人永远不会闭嘴
Plus, you know, you can never get chicks to shut up.
好吧,同志们 等一会儿见
All right, guys, catch up with you later.
浴室空空
Empty shower.
万岁!
Yes!
我能洗澡了 我能洗澡了
I get to take a shower. I get to take a shower.
麦尔肯姆·菲斯特斯,宿舍长
Malcolm Festes, dorm director.
在浴室里一定要穿浴鞋
Shower shoes are to be worn in the bathroom at all times
除非是沐浴的时候
except when in the actual shower.
难道你没看宿舍生活手册吗?
Did you not read your Dorm Life pamphlet?
在你的厨子里
It was in your cubby.
如何,帅哥?
Wassup, dawg?
好,不错,挺好
Yeah. OK, homey.
回见
Later.
喂,你忘了…这个绕脚布
Hey. You forgot… this, Coolio.
是啊,要你管
Word, G-Money.
好了,海斯丁斯,该你上了!
OK, Hastings, you’re up!
海斯丁斯,你聋了吗?!
Hastings, are you deaf?!
赶快,上场!
Come on, let’s go!
快滚上场!上啊!
Get your butt out there! Come on!
上去!
Get out!
老天!
Jesus!
来啊,宝贝。来啊
Come on, baby. Come on.
起床了
Rise and shine.
等等!放手!
Wait! Let go!
放手!
Let go!
欢迎来到地狱
Welcome to hell!
先生们! 让我来介绍这些新的足球队员
Gentlemen! Let me present this year’s soccer newbies!
首先,你们要脱衣服!
First, you must remove your clothes!
脱衣服! 脱衣服!
Remove their clothes! Remove their clothes!
现在就脱掉!
Take your clothes off now!
脱掉他们的衣服!
Remove their clothes!
喂?我悲哀的人生
Hello. My life sucks.
– 我完了! – 什么?
– I’m done! – What?
大家都以为我是衰哥怪物
Everybody thinks I’m a loser deviant.
这样我连去看康沃尔比赛的机会都没了
I’ll never see the field against Cornwall.
我浑身发愁 别人都笑话我
And I smell so bad I’m convulsing people.
来接我回家 确保我不再做这种傻事了
Pick me up, take me home and make sure I never do anything like this again.
听着,维, 我不知道怎么混球队
Look, Vi, I don’t know what to tell you about the whole soccer team…
但我知道怎么混人缘 我有个主意
…but as for the social stuff, I got an idea.
-真的? – 真的
– You do? – Yeah.
我们来让大家看看你的男人本色
We’re gonna show everybody the man that you really are.

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