比萨 深盘子 吃了三片
I can’t get her to eat anything.
我怎么说她都不吃
I know you can’t. Don’t do this for me.
我知道你不行 这么做不是为了我
Do it for the children.
为了孩子们
Yeah! Oh, stop!
太好了 别闹
Come on, you’re late!
快点 你们迟到了
What are you, in character right away?
马上就要出镜了 干嘛呢你们
Come on, let’s go!
快点 我们得进去了
She’s inside.
她在里面
What is that?
你穿的这叫什么
What?
什么
Did Victoria Beckham have a yard sale? Why are you wearing that?
维多利亚·贝克汉姆卖旧货了吗 你为什么穿成这样
Are you kidding me?
你开玩笑吗
This is what you bought for me.
这身是你给我买的
I know, I know. I’m just saying is it…
我知道 我知道 我只是说这身
All right, we’re stuck with it,
好吧 我们很喜欢这身衣服
I just think it’s a little over the top, but…
我只是觉得有点过分了 但是
Thanks. Happy to be here to help you.
谢谢 很高兴来这里帮你的忙
The first rule of improv is always accept the information.
即兴表演的第一个规则就是要接受新信息
If someone says something, just go with it.
如果有人说了什么话 随波逐流就可以了
No negating.
不要否认
Gotcha. That sounds good, that’s smart.
明白 听起来不错 很明智
In my acting class, when someone says “No” in a scene,
在我的表演课上 当有人在剧中说了”不”
the whole class yells, “Die!”
整个班级都会喊 “去死”
No. I mean, no one will say “No” then.
不 我是说 没有人会说”不”
Don’t yell “Die.”
不要喊 “去死”
Who’s up for some warm up exercises?
谁来做次热身练习
No, honey, I’m not gonna do that. The what?
不 亲爱的 我不想做 什么
The tip of the tongue, the teeth, the lips.
黑化肥发挥会发灰
The tip of the tongue, the teeth, the lips.
灰化肥挥发会发黑
I got one for you. Shut up!
我也给你来个练习 闭嘴
All right, let’s go already. Are you ready there, Mafia?
好了 我们走 你准备好了吗 黑手党
Hell, yeah. Let’s do it!
还用你说 我们出发
麦克芬尼根游乐园
Stinks.
真臭
Smells like kids’ feet and like skidmark underwear.
一股孩子的脚臭味 还有股汗臭的内衣味
Happy Father’s Day.
父亲节快乐
Oh! Jeez!
天啊
Mommy! That man put his pee pee on my face!
妈妈 那个男人把小鸡鸡贴到了我的脸上
What?
坑爹哪
He put his face on my pee pee. Danny!
是他把脸贴到我的小鸡鸡上 丹尼
I’m saying he’s the one. I don’t think it matters.
我想澄清是他干的 多大点儿事儿
No, I get you.
是没什么 我明白了
Oh, oh! Palmer, darling.
帕莫尔 亲爱的
Devlin. Thank you so much for bringing the kids today.
德芙琳 非常感谢你今天把孩子们带过来
I don’t think she was the only one who brought them.
我想她不是唯一带孩子的人
You know what I’m saying? They are my pride and joy.
你懂我的意思吗 他们是我的骄傲和欢乐
So I’d like to introduce you to, the one and only,
很高兴介绍给你 唯一的
Kiki Dee, who came out at nine pounds four ounces.
琪琪蒂 出生时九英镑四英两
Yeouch.
要命吧
And then the whopper, we call him, Bart,
然后是这个特大物 我们叫他巴特
because he was a 12 pounder and did some damage.
因为他有十二英镑重 可让妈妈受苦了
Hi, you guys.
你们好 孩子们
Hello, Palmer.
你好 帕莫尔
Heard so much about you.
听说了不少关于你的故事
You’re British?
你是英国人
So you’re the bird what’s
你就是那个把我父亲
been given Daddy the ol’ slap and tickle?
搞得五迷三道的小妞啊
We sent her to boarding school last year in England.
我们去年送她去了英国寄宿学校
See? So she picked up a slight accent.
所以她说话带点口音
It’s, you know, very Madonna.
非常的”麦当娜”
Well, it is a pleasure meeting you, Kiki Dee.
很高兴见到你 琪琪蒂
Wish I could say the same.
希望我也可以这么说
You see, before you, I had meself a father.
在你之前 我还算有自己的父亲
I was the apple of his eye.
我是他眼中的宝贝
It was all giggling and chasing butterflies
我们总是边笑边在草坪上追逐蝴蝶
in the meadows, and what have you.
做诸如此类的事
And now what do I got?
现在我有什么
An hour and a half every other week
每隔一周花一个半小时
at J.D. McFunnigan’s with him and his whore.
在麦克芬尼根乐园和他以及他的荡妇相处
Koko! Kiki! Kiki!
蔻蔻 不是 琪琪 琪琪
God, she’s in such pain.
天哪 她好像很痛苦
No, that’s the pills that…
不 那是药物作用
She took some out of her mother’s bureau.
她从她母亲的衣柜里翻出来的
Are you…
你在
All right, let me go see her.
我去看看她
How are you doing, sweetie?
你怎么样 甜心
I’ll be better when I start seeing some tokens.
见到游戏币 哥才给你好脸看
He’s American.
他是美国人
Excuse me. Yo! What was that all about?
对不起 说你呢 刚才说的话是什么意思
That was raw and real and in the moment.
那是即兴的未加工的现场版
You know, I feel very good about it.
我自我感觉非常良好
You do? Well, I don’t!
是吗 可我不
So if you wanna get your money and your acting classes,
如果你还想要钱 还有你的表演课
you better start doing things right from now on.
现在就好好表现
No more sob stories.
别给我编悲情故事
And we’re stuck with the English accent now, Ringo,
继续讲英音 你这臭妞
so commit to it. Don’t choke, got it?
给我好好演 别再抽抽了 听懂没有
Got it.
明白
Now hug me and laugh
现在拥抱我 并且大笑
and let’s get back into the show.
让我们接着演
Okay. Papa!
好吧 爸爸
You’re not a whore, Palmer.
你不是荡妇 帕莫尔
Okay.
好吧
That’s so nice. See what they do, they fight,
太甜蜜了 看看他们 先是吵架
then they make up and it’s good.
然后又会和好如初
Good. We’re doing good.
很好 我们做的很好
Are you kidding me?
坑爹呢
Got a hamburger here for Bart, Art the Water Fart.
汉堡包给巴特 垃圾食品
Here you go, kid.
给你 孩子
Look at that, sweet!
看看 真温馨
And two quesadillas for Kiki Sneaky With a Side of Freaky.
两份油炸玉米饼给鬼灵精怪的琪琪
Here’s the waters. No soda for you.
这些是水 不加苏打的给你
You’re battling diabetes, remember? Huh?
你在和糖尿病作战 记得吗
Kiki Dee?
琪琪蒂
I got you two quesadillas ’cause
我给你两份油炸玉米饼
it’s your favorite food so you have to eat it.
因为这是你最喜欢的食物 所以你得把它都吃了
Well, yes! And that’s why
是啊 这就是为什么
I’m going to eat every single bit of it.
我每周都会吃的片甲不留
All right, let’s see.
好吧 我们拭目以待
Yummy!
好吃
Thank you.
谢谢
Hey, I think we forgot napkins.
我们忘了拿餐巾纸
We did? Okay. Well let me get the napkins.
是吗 我去拿
Because I know she’s not gonna get up and do it
我知道她不会起身去拿
because she doesn’t like to get up and do anything.
因为她没有任何起身做事情的意思
Oh, nice.
真会说
Everybody be cool.
大家先聊着
So, Bart, your dad tells me you like to go to the bathroom.
巴特 你爸爸告诉我你特别爱去洗手间
When I feel it, I do it.
哥想尿 就尿
What else do you like?
你还喜欢什么
I don’t know.
不知道
That’s our Bart.
这就是我们的巴特
He’s a man of very few words.
他不太爱说话
Ah. Okay.
好吧
Maybe I’m upset.
也许是因为我情绪低落
Upset about me and your father dating?
是因为我和你爸爸约会吗
No. You seem to make my dad happy and that’s cool, but…
不是 你让我父亲感到快乐 这很好 但是
But what?
但是什么
Nothing.
没什么
Hey, I want you to feel comfortable
我希望咱们之间不要