天赐灵机（2021）

There are no friends in the shed.
嗨
Hi!
我是巴尼的B宝
I am Barney’s B-Bot.
我住杂物间 -小心
I live in the shed.
我的作用是交朋友
I am for making friends.
白♥痴♥
Idiot!
我在分享巴尼的早餐 请问喜欢吗？
I am sharing Barney’s breakfast. Do you like it?
那你呢？
How about you?
要不要给这张照片留言 老奶奶？
Would you like to comment on this picture, old woman?
巴尼喜欢石头、气喘药
Barney likes rocks, asthma inhalers,
和奶奶做的饭菜
and his grandmother’s food.
要不要来杂物间帮他按赞？
Will you come to my secret shed and like him?
不…不要 不要
No. No, no. No.
巴尼也喜欢石锤
Barney likes rock hammers, too!
我迟到了
I’m gonna be late.
我的裤子穿反了
My pants are on backwards.
是巴尼起床的SOP
That was Barney’s wake-up routine!
然后呢？ -交友邀请
Okay. – Friend request.
交友邀请
Friend request.
（影印店 影印扫描列印）
（巴尼的朋友）
（请当巴尼的朋友）
所谓的质数就是大于1的自然数
So a prime number is a natural number greater than one
而且不能被其他数字整除
that cannot be divided by any number.
你很热情很好
I know you’re keen,
但是还没下课 巴尼
but it’s not quite recess yet, Barney.
我气喘 我需要吸入器
Oh, my asthma. I need my inhaler, ma’am.
我…我马上就回来
Uh, I’ll be one minute.
阿荣 你在这里做什么啊？
Ron! What are you doing here?
杂物间里没有朋友
There are no friends in the shed.
我的作用是交朋友
I am for making friends.
不…你必须回家 趁现在还没…
No! No, no, no. You have to go before they come out for…
下课了
Recess.
您有两则新讯息
You have two new messages.
才两则？
Only two?
嘿 巴尼
Hey, Barn.
你有B宝？
You got a B-Bot?
叫他们带些零食过来
帅喔
Awesome.
帮他按一个爱心 加他好友
感觉还不错
Huh. Well, that went well.
我也觉得
I thought so.
您收到一张照片
好了
Okay.
你好 戴维斯 记得打给他
过来
Come on.
哇 这个好单纯喔
Wow, that’s so minimalistic.
就像空白的画布
It’s like a blank canvas.
交友邀请
Friend request.
阿莫汉对你的照片做了评论
下课
Recess.
好像还蛮愉快的
Maybe it’ll be okay.
下课不会糟糕
Recess will not suck.
你会有朋友陪你坐长椅
You will have friends to sit with on a bench.
我不知道
I don’t know.
对 应该吧
Yeah. I guess.
会有的
You will.
我帮你搜寻
I have brought you some.
什么？
What?
我显然不是垃圾
I am literally not landfill.
这太疯狂了
This is so crazy.
阿荣 等等
Ron! Wait!
嘿 小心点啦
（巴尼的朋友）
你有五个新朋友
You have five new friends.
是我搜寻到的
I did a search for them.
夏恩喜欢廉价的酒精饮料和阴谋论
Shayne likes low-priced alcohol and conspiracy theories.
他相信瑞士下方有个秘密的蜥蜴政♥府♥
He believes there’s a secret lizard government beneath Switzerland. – Shh.
让他住杂物间就加你好友
He will friend you if he can stay in the shed.
巴尼 老弟
Barney! Bro!
一年就好 最多两年
Just for a year. Two max.
是你朋友吗 巴尼？
Are those your friends, Barney?
这是什么？派对吗？
Is this, like, a rave?
这个朋友分享了你的早餐 他很喜欢
This friend shared your breakfast and liked it.
耶
Oh, yeah!
他跟你一样会饿
He gets hungry like you.
你的邻居巴太太的鹦鹉
Your neighbor Mrs.
跟你有共同的朋友
Baxter’s parrot has one friend in common with you.
你的邻居巴太太
Your neighbor, Mrs. Baxter.
在你的照片上留言
He commented on your photo.
牠还在照片上做了别的事
He has done other things on your photo, too.
玛格莉特会加你好友并分享 -不
Margaret will friend you and share her… – No.
拿去 都给你…
…purse, watch, anything
她只要我把她放走
if I please, please just let her go.
现在下课时 你有朋友陪你坐长椅了
Now you have friends to sit with on a bench at recess.
我很抱歉 你们不能在这里
I’m so sorry. You can’t be here.
巴尼 见五号♥朋友
Barney, meet friend number five.
这个小秃子 他也喜欢你的照片
This tiny bald man likes your picture so much,
他正在吃
he is eating it.
他在这里 罗根
There he is! Logan!
交友邀请 交友邀请
Friend request, friend request.
阿荣？ -阿荣…
Ron? – Ron, Ron, Ron.
各位来吧 阿荣… -阿荣…
Yeah! Come on! – Ron, Ron, Ron!
莎凡娜妈妈不认识这个男孩
Savannah Meads’ mom didn’t recognize the boy.
我们要去学校
We’re at her school now.
好 好
Okay, sure.
各位我们低调一点
We keep this low-key, people.
谨慎、保持安静 好吗？
Discreet, nice and quiet, okay?
爱你们 -阿荣…
Love you guys! – Ron, Ron, Ron.
普多斯基
Pudowski!
耶 去反抗当权者
Yeah! Sticking it to the man!
去见校长 快
Principal’s office. Now!
飞机
嘿 兄弟 -嘿 我们继续玩
Hey, bros. Ho-ho-ho-ho.
不行啦 快上课了
走吧 普多斯基 快点 -准备好了
Come on, Pudowski. Move it!
就是你 对吧？
You’re not new, are you?
你就是那个打我的疯子
You’re that crazy broken dude who punched me.
你怎么做的？
How’d you do that?
我没有安全性设定之类的
I have no mega safety controls and stuff.
安全性设定、家长控制权、帐号♥限制
Safety settings, parental controls, account limits,
都没
all off!
难怪它可以打你
That’s how come he hit you, dude!
我也好想要 这样它就能打我
I want mine like that. Then it can hit me, too!
还能看限制级电影
I could get R-rated movies.
拷贝 破解程式
Copy him. Find that code.
解锁
Unlock.
解锁 -解锁
Unlock.
我们会有上兆的点阅率
He’s gonna get us a trillion views!
我讨厌你
I don’t like you.
我也讨厌你
I don’t like you.
嗨 妳好
Hey, guys.
莎凡娜 发生什么事了？
Savannah. What’s going on?
是泡泡总部
It’s Bubble!
我的贴文太夯了
My post is such a hit,
公♥司♥的人都在追踪我
the whole company’s following me.
是什么贴文？
What post?
两万个好友按赞
Twenty thousand friends love…
什么？我说过它必须是个秘密
What? I said he has to be a secret.
我知道 可是它太吸睛了
I know. But it went crazy!
你实在是有够怪的 巴尼
You’re such an actual freak, Barney,
这真是酷毙了
it’s, like, almost cool.
普多斯基
Pudowski!
普多斯基 怎么一回事？
Pudowski! What is going on?
没事 哈特莉校长
Nothing, Ms. Hartley.
你带婴儿到学校？
You brought in a baby?
还有人工加糖饮料？