王牌大贱谍（1997）

除非世人付我们大笔赎金
That is, unless the world pays us a hefty ransom.
那也已经发生了
That also already has happened.
妈的
Shit.
用老方法
Hell, let’s just do what we always do–
以核武挟持全球作人♥质♥
hijack some nuclear weapons and hold the world hostage.
各位，我注意到前苏联共和国
Gentlemen, it’s come to my attention… a breakaway Russian republic, Kreplachistan…
要将核子弹头运往联♥合♥国♥
is about to transfer a nuclear warhead… to the United Nations in a few days.
计划如下
Here’s the plan.
取得弹头，向全球勒索赎金
We get the warhead and hold the world ransom for…
一百万美金
one million dollars!
你不觉得应该要一百万以上吗
Don’t you think we should maybe ask… for more than a million dollars?
时下一百万不算很多钱
A million dollars isn’t exactly a lot of money these days.
维朱康一年就赚90亿
Virtucon alone makes over $9 billion a year.
真的？
Really?
很多
That’s a lot more.
好吧
OK, then. We hold the world ransom for…
向全球勒索一千亿
one hundred billion dollars!
好帅的巨无霸喷射机
Pretty groovy jumbo jet, eh?
看到爽的可别震惊
When you see this jet a-rockin’… don’t come a-knockin’, baby!
你必须签这些弃权文件
I’m going to need you to sign these release forms.
弃权文件？
Release forms?
你并非正式为国防部工作
You’re not officially working for Ministry of Defense…
这些文件让本部免于事故赔偿
and these forms indemnify the ministry against… any mishaps that may occur in the line of duty.
事故？
Mishaps? But isn’t that what being…
干间谍不就是这么回事吗？
an international man of mystery’s all about?
好，姓名：奥斯汀危险鲍尔
Name–Austin…Danger Powers.
性(别)：好，来吧
Sex–yes, please!
你这么性感怎么会在国防部
How does a hot chick like you… end up working at the Ministry of Defense?
我在牛津大学有几科很杰出
Well, I went to Oxford… where I excelled in several subjects…
但我专精外语
but I ended up specializing in foreign languages.
我真的很想旅行，看世界
I really wanted to travel. You know, sort of see the world?
真美，到后面爽一下吧
That’s fascinating. Why don’t we go in the back and shag?
什么？
What?
我要看零件是不是还能用
I’ve been frozen for 30 years. I’ve gotta see if my bits and pieces are still working.
你说什么？
Excuse me?
我的鱼竿
My wedding tackle.
你说什么？
I’m sorry–
我的香肠，我的香蕉
My meat and two veg, my twig and berries.
鲍尔先生，拜托
Hello, lads, you still awake? Mr. Powers, please.
请专注你的任务，让性冲动休息
I’d appreciate it if you could concentrate on our mission… and give your libido a rest.
我能不能让你看样东西
Can I show you something?
我不会咬的…
I won’t bite…
很用力
hard.
好了
All right.
我问你一个问题，老实讲
Let me ask you a question, and be honest.
我让你亢奋了吗？
Do I make you horny?
亢奋了吗？宝贝，有吗？
Randy?
希望这是解冻的过程
I hope this is part of the unfreezing process.
乱流，你看，我摔跤了
Oh, turbulence! Look at that! I’ve gone over!
又摔跤了
Oh, I fell over again!
鲍尔先生，我绝不会跟你做
I will never have sex with you, ever!
就算世界上只剩一男一女
If you were the last man on Earth and I was the last woman on Earth…
而人类仰赖我们的性♥爱♥繁殖
and the future of the human race depended on our having sex simply for procreation…
我还是不会跟你做
I still would not have sex with you.
你的重点在哪儿？
What’s your point?
你冷冻精♥子♥时说如果你没回来
Remember when we froze your semen? You said if it didn’t look like you were coming back…
我们要给你一个儿子
we should try to make you a son…
让你有后代可以繁延
so that a part of you could live forever.
是啊
Sure.
经过几年我们等得不太耐烦
After a couple of years, we got a little impatient.
邪恶博士，请见过你儿子
Dr. Evil, I want you to meet your son.
我儿子？
My son?
史考特
Scott !
你好，史考特
Hello,Scott . Hi .
我是你父亲，邪恶博士
I’m your father. Dr. Evil .
我这辈子没见过你
I haven’t seen you my whole life…
你一回来就想要父子关系
and now you come back and just expect a relationship?
我恨你
I hate you.
干嘛？
What?
可以抱一下吗？
Could I have a hug?
不
No
抱一下 不要
Give me a hug. -No way.I’m not coming over there.
过来 不过去
I’m not coming over there.
快 休想
Let’s go. -Forget it.
快
Pronto.
你在干嘛？
What are you doing?
我跟得上时代
I’m with it. I’m hip.
别当我是科学怪人，让我抱抱
Don’t look at me like I’m frickin’ Frankenstein. Give your father a hug.
别碰我
Hey, don’t touch me!
抱抱，抱抱
Hug…
走开，眯眯眼的神经病
Get away from me, you lazy-eyed psycho!
赌城万岁，宝贝
Viva Las Vegas, baby!
欢迎光临赌城
Welcome to Las Vegas, sir.
你要睡床的哪一边？
So, which side of the bed do you want?
你去睡沙发
You’re sleeping on the sofa.
我要趁机提醒你
In fact, I’d like to remind you…
同♥房♥♥是为了伪装成夫妻来度假
that the only reason we’re sharing a room… is to keep up the context… that we’re a married couple on vacation.
好，要先搞还是等会儿呢
Shall we shag now, or shall we shag later?
你喜欢怎样？要先洗澡吗？
How do you like to do it? Do you like to wash up first…
洗奶奶和小♥弟♥弟♥，妓♥女♥澡
you know, top and tails, whore’s bath?
我个人办事前喜欢验收
Before I’m on the job, I like to give my undercarriage… a bit of a how’s-your-father.
开玩笑的，我只想博君一笑
I’m just joking. I’m just trying to get a rise out of you… for shits and giggles.
打开行李吧
Let’s unpack.
哎呀，大家留意
Blimey… nerd alert!
这怎么会在这儿？
How did this get in here?
有人跟我恶作剧
Somebody’s playing a prank on me.
真的不是我的
Honestly, it’s not mine.
嘿，美国人
Hey, Americans!
请享用美酒，你来了啊？
Enjoy that wine. There you are.
我认识你吗？
Do I know you?
不，你人是在这儿啊
No, but that’s where you are. You’re there.
赌城万岁，宝贝，你好吗？
Viva Las Vegas, baby.
奥斯汀
Austin
赌城有一家公♥司♥叫维朱康
There’s a company in Las Vegas called Virtucon…
可能跟邪恶博士有关
which we think may be linked to Dr. Evil.
很多主管到这家赌场赌博
Plenty of Virtucon executives are gambling in this casino.
太帅了，走
Smashing. Let’s go.
那边就一个
There’s one over there.
换一千
Changing a thousand.
对不起
Excuse me.
我可以加入吗？
Do you mind if I join you?
没问题
Not at all.
21点，各位
The game is blackjack, gentlemen.
最少下注一万
Ten thousand dollars minimum bet.
你是老K，你3点
King for you, sir, and a three for you.
17点
Seventeen?
发牌
Hit me.
你17点了，先生
You have 17, sir.
我喜欢活在危险中
I like to live dangerously.
4，21点
Four. Twenty-one.
5点
Five. 5 .
不要了
I’ll stay.
我建议你要，先生
I suggest you hit, sir.
我也喜欢活在危险中
I also like to live dangerously.
随便你
As you wish, sir.
20点赢你的5点，抱歉
Twenty beats your five. I’m sorry, sir.
我不会骗你
I won’t lie to you.
玩扑克牌我不行
Cards are not my bag, baby.
请容我自我介绍
Allow myself to introduce… myself.
我叫瑞奇卡宁汉
My name is Richie Cunningham,