死侍2：我爱我家

谷[石头]…
Rock…
底
meet bottom.
我爱你 韦德·威尔逊
I love you, Wade Wilson.
妮莎
Ness?
妮莎
Hey, Ness!
妮莎 你能让我进去吗
Ness, can you let me in?
求你了 求你了
Please! Please.
上帝啊
Jesus.
你给我的提示太少了
You’re not giving me a lot of direction here.
我已经到末路了
I’m at the end of my rope.
后来我加入了X战警
Then I joined the X-Men.
我进了监狱 我…
I went to prison. I, uh…
是那个孩子吗
Is it the kid?
孩子们给我们一个机会变得更好
Kids give us a chance to be better than we used to be.
那个孩子
The kid!
那就是她的意思
That’s exactly what she meant.
你的心没放对地方
Your heart needs to be in the right place.
我不会抛弃这个孩子
I’m not gonna abandon this kid.
他身边 从来没有任何人
He’s never had anyone, ever.
我要变得无私
I need to be selfless.
好吧 但那是什么意思
Yeah, but what does that mean?
意思是我要拯救罗素
It means I’m gonna save Russell.
也许我救不了凡妮莎
Maybe I couldn’t save Vanessa…
但也许我能拯救新西兰的青壮少年
but maybe I can save a robust teenager from New Zealand.
但是我的意思是”无私”这个词
Yeah, but what I mean is, like, the word “Selfless.”
我真的不懂那是什么意思
I literally don’t know what that means.
上帝啊
Jesus Christ.
听着 据我的人说…
Okay, look. According to my guy, okay…
这些变种人马上要被转移到
those muties are being transferred
80英里外的超级监狱了
to a supermax, 80 miles away.
很好 我在路上劫他们
Great, I’ll pick ’em off along the way.
先别急着出蛋 伙计
Hold your testicles there, buddy, okay?
这可是会有重装部队进行护送…
We’re talking about an armored convoy…
还有一名来自未来的超级凶残士兵
and a vicious super soldier from the future…
想把你的头骨变成一个飞机杯
that is looking to turn your skull into a fuckable ashtray.
你知道我们要干什么吗
You know what we need to do?
我们要组建一支小队
We need to build a fucking team.
我们需要一群强大 灵活变通
We need ’em tough, morally flexible…
并且要年轻的人 能守住这个队标10到12年
and young enough so they can carry this franchise 10 to 12 years.
一队专业的混♥蛋♥
A team of highly-skilled motherfuckers.
我说的可是《十四罗汉》 《侠盗二号♥》
I’m talking about some Ocean’s 14 shit. Rogue Two.
《疾速追杀3》 但是原班制♥作♥人水平
John Wick 3, but with the original director.
我的身体就是死亡的工具
My body is an instrument of death.
现在不是时候 都朋德
Not now, Dopinder.
我可能可以派上大用场
I could be of great use.
你的超能力是什么
What’s your superpower?
-勇气 -真可爱
– Courage. – That’s adorable.
那你有勇气去查看
Do you have the courage to check and see…
分配器中有足够的卫生棉吗
if there are enough sanitary napkins in the dispenser?
是 长官
Yes, sir.
抱歉让你看到这一幕
I’m sorry you had to see that,
不过很高兴让你听到了他的回答
although I’m glad you heard it.
好了 我去招募收简历
All right, I’ll put out a call for resumes.
但是我们不支付医保和牙医费用
But we’re not paying medical or dental.
该重新启用领英了
It’s time to get back on LinkedIn.
所有犯人请注意
Attention, all inmates!
将于八点开始向交叉力最高等级监狱
Transport to Cross Force Maximum Security
变种人关押所 进行犯人转移
Mutant Containment Facility will begin at 0800 hours.
将于六点开始检查监狱以及事务处理
Inspection of your cells and out processing will begin at 0600.
你想要什么
What the fuck do you want?
那他妈是我的布丁
That’s my fucking pudding.
-去你♥妈♥的♥布丁 -你喜欢布丁
– Fuck your pudding! – You like pudding?
有人吗
Hello?
我知道你在里面
I know you’re in there.
作为这里块头最大的家伙肯定也不好过吧
Must be hard being the biggest guy in here.
高处不胜寒吧
Lonely at the top, eh?
他们明天就要转移我们了
They’re moving us tomorrow.
也许我能带你离开这里
Maybe I can get you out of here.
然后整个世界都是我们的
And we can make the whole world our bitch.
我们需要一个暗号♥
We need a secret code.
不 那太蠢了 罗素 笨蛋
No, that’s stupid, Russell. Idiot.
我们是一个团队
We’re a team.
我们像暴徒 我们像黑帮
We’re like thugs, we’re like gangsters.
我就像图帕克 你就像冰块
I’m like Tupac, and you’re like Ice Cube.
假设她也会唱饶舌
Supposedly, she can rap, too.
我喜欢
I like that.
很棒 这些都很棒
Terrific, these are all terrific.
这是喧嚣
Meet Bedlam.
名字不错 超能力
Cool name! Superpowers?
我可以干扰电磁场
I can distort electrical fields.
包括你脑内的场
Including the one inside your brain…
造成焦虑 混乱…
causing anxiety, confusion…
痛苦
pain.
基本上来说 你就是戴夫·马休斯
So, basically, you’re Dave Matthews.
我们可以用上他
We can use him.
我是泽特盖斯特
I’m Zeitgeist.
不错 我喜欢
Cool. I like it.
那你有能力
So you have the power
抓住社会的命脉吗
to put your finger on the pulse of society?
不
No.
不 我会吐酸液
No, I spit acidic vomit.
-要我表演一下吗 -不
– Do you want me to demonstrate? – No!
我们信你
We’ll take your word for it.
谢谢 听着 我们都在阿比汉堡吃过饭
Thank you. Yeah. Listen, we’ve all eaten at Arby’s, okay?
这是消隐者
And this is the Vanisher.
但是…
But…
消隐者
Vanisher!
-真棒 -对吧
– Nice! – Right?
他根本不在 对吗
He’s not here, is he?
他可能迟到了
He may be running late.
我叫拉什蒂 但我用里碎星这个名字
My name’s Rusty, but I go by Shatterstar.
很不错
That’s good, yeah.
-拉什蒂真是太烂了 -不行
– “Rusty” Is terrible. – Toughie.
-你来自哪里 -魔幻世界星球
– So, uh, where are you from? – The planet Mojo World.
-那你是外星人了 -名字真烂
– So you’re an alien, I guess. – Bad name.
那对我们有什么帮助呢
How does that, uh, help us?
我基本上什么都比你们强
I’m basically better than you at everything.
总有一天 我要找个所有人
Just once, I’m gonna find a planet of people
各方面都不如我的星球
that are worse than me at everything.
都是一群蠢蛋
A whole bunch of functional idiots.
我要去那里 变成他们的超人
I’m gonna go there, and I’m gonna be their Superman.
你是说加拿大吗
Isn’t that Canada?
你♥他♥妈♥给我闭嘴
You shut your goddamn trash mouth!
-这是 -多米诺
– Meet… – Domino.
-你的能力是什么 -我很幸运
– What’s your shtick? – I’m lucky.
那不是超能力
That’s not a superpower.
-就是 -不是
– Yeah, it is. – No, it isn’t.
-就是 -不是
– Yeah, it is. – No, it isn’t.
-就是 -不是
– Yeah, it is. – No, it isn’t.
-就是 -不是
– Yes, it is. – No, it isn’t.
-就是 -真的不是
– Yeah, it is. – Really isn’t.
-不是 -就是
– No, it isn’t. – Yes, it is.
我说吧
Told you.
滚出我的脑子
Get out of my head!
我没在你脑子里
I’m not in your head.
我在一个11岁小孩的卧室里
I’m in an 11-year-old’s bedroom.
如果你真有那么幸运
Well, if you’re so lucky,
那你为什么来这里和我们一起
then what are you doing here with us?
我还不知道
I don’t know yet.
什么意思
What’s that supposed to mean?