搏击俱乐部

那么 我们各有三个 一共六个了 第七天呢
So, we each have three. That’s six. What about the seventh day?
我要肠癌
I want ascending bowel cancer.
这个女人下过一番功夫
The girl had done her homework.
不成 肠癌是我的
No. No. I want bowel cancer.
那也是你的最爱吗 跟我抢啊
That’s your favorite too? Tried to slip it by me, eh?
这样 我们分了它吧
Look, we’re gonna split it, OK?
每月第一个和第三个周日归你
Take the first and third Sunday of the month.
成交
Deal.
看来是要道别了
Looks like this is goodbye.
我们就别小题大做了吧
Well, let’s not make a big thing out of it, OK?
你这样还没小题大做
How’s this for not making a big thing?
嘿 Marla Marla
Hey, Marla! Marla!
也 也许我们应该互相留个电♥话♥
May… maybe we should exchange numbers.
有必要吗
Should we?
万一我们想调换互助会时间呢
We might wanna switch nights.
好吧
OK.
我就是这么认识Marla Singer的
This is how I met Marla Singer.
Marla的人生哲学是她随时都可能会死
Marla’s philosophy of life was that she might die at any moment.
她说 悲剧的是她一直都没死
The tragedy, she said, was that she didn’t.
上面没有你的名字啊 你叫什么
It doesn’t have your name! Who are you?
Cornelius Rupert 还是Travis
Cornelius? Rupert? Travis?
是你哪天晚上给的蠢名字吗
Any of the stupid names you give each night?
你在西雅图机场醒来
You wake up at SeaTac.
旧金山机场 洛杉矶机场
SFO. LAX.
芝加哥奥黑尔机场 达拉斯沃思堡机场 巴尔地摩华盛顿国际机场
You wake up at O’Hare. Dallas Fort Worth. BWI.
太平洋 山区 中部
Pacific. Mountain. Central.
不断变换时区
Lose an hour. Gain an hour.
先生 您乘坐的航♥班♥两小时后才开始办理登记手续
Check-in for that flight doesn’t begin for another two hours, sir.
这就是你的人生 正一分一分地消逝
This is your life, and it’s ending one minute at a time.
你在凤♥凰♥空港国际机场醒来
You wake up at Air Harbor International.
如果你在不同时间 不同地点醒来
If you wake up at a different time, in a different place,
你会变成一个不同的人吗
could you wake up as a different person?
不管到哪儿 我都过着渺小的生活
Everywhere I travel, tiny life.
单人份砂糖包 单人份奶油 一小块儿黄油
Single-serving sugar, single-serving cream, single pat of butter.
微波炉加热的法式蓝带航♥空♥套餐
The microwave cordon bleu hobby kit.
洗发护发旅行包
Shampoo-conditioner combos.
试用装漱口水 小块肥皂
Sample package mouthwash. Tiny bars of soap.
我在每次航♥班♥遇到的人 也只是”一次性”的朋友
The people I meet on each flight, they’re single-serving friends.
在起飞和降落间 我们共享一段时光 仅此而已
Between takeoff and landing, we have our time together. That’s all we get.
欢迎光临
Welcome!
在漫长时间轴上的某一点 每个人的存活率都会降为零
On a long-enough time line, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
我是一名汽车召回协调员 我的工作就是套用公式
I was a recall coordinator. My job was to apply the formula.
那婴儿就是从挡风玻璃飞出来的 这个三分
The infant went through the windshield. Three points.
我们公♥司♥产的一辆新车 时速96公里驶离某个地方的时候
A new car built by my company leaves somewhere traveling at 60mph.
后差速器突然锁死了
The rear differential locks up.
小孩的牙套还卡在后座的烟灰缸上
The teenager’s braces are stuck to the backseat ashtray.
可以当个不错的戒烟广♥告♥
Might make a good anti-smoking ad.
整个车子玉石俱焚 所有困在里面的人都死了
The car crashes and burns with everyone trapped inside.
那么 我们应该召回这款车吗
Now, should we initiate a recall?
那爸爸一定很胖
The father must’ve been huge.
看到座位上脂肪烧过的痕迹吗 穿的是涤纶衬衫
See where the fats burned to the seat? The polyester shirt?
很有现代艺术感
Very modern art.
将这款车的售出量 A
Take the number of vehicles in the field, A.
乘以出故障的概率 B
Multiply it by the probable rate of failure, B.
再乘以庭外和解需要的平均费用 C
Then multiply the result by the average out-of-court settlement, C.
A乘以B乘以C
A times B times C…
等于X
equals X.
如果X小于召回成本 我们就不召回
If X is less than the cost of a recall, we don’t do one.
这种意外很多吗
Are there a lot of these kinds of accidents?
多到你无法想象
You wouldn’t believe.
你是哪家汽车公♥司♥的
Which car company do you work for?
很大的一家
A major one.
每次飞机起飞或降落转弯太急剧时
Every time the plane banked too sharply on takeoff or landing,
我都祈祷来个飞机坠毁或是空中撞击 什么都行
I prayed for a crash or a mid-air collision. Anything.
出差时意外死亡 人寿保险会赔三倍
Life insurance pays off triple if you die on a business trip.
如果您坐在紧急出口旁边
If you are seated in an emergency exit row
并且您觉得自己无力或不愿履行
And feel you would be unable or unwilling to perform
安全卡上列明的义务
the duties listed on the safety card,
请向乘务人员要求换座位
please ask a flight attendant to reseat you.
看来你的责任很重
It’s a lot of responsibility.
想要换座位吗
Wanna switch seats?
算了 我觉得我不适合做那份工作
No. I’m not sure I’m the man for that particular job.
三万英尺高的紧急出口
An exit-door procedure at 30,000 feet.
嗯哼
Mm-hm.
有什么安全可言
The illusion of safety.
对啊 我想也是
Yeah. I guess so.
知道为什么飞机上会有氧气罩吗
You know why they put oxzgen masks on planes?
让你能呼吸呗
So you can breathe.
是因为氧气会让你兴奋
Oxzgen gets you high.
碰到灾难性突发事故时 你会慌乱得大口喘气
In a catastrophic emergency, you take giant panic breaths.
吸了氧气你就突然镇定下来 接受现实
Suddenly you become euphoric, docile. You accept your fate.
都在这儿画着呢
It’s all right here.
紧急水上降落 时速每小时966公里
Emergency water landing, 600 mph.
乘客们都面无表情 跟印度神牛一样镇定自若
Blank faces. Calm as Hindu cows.
你刚才说的 呃
That’s, um…
理论很有趣
That’s an interesting theory.
你是干什么的
What do you do?
什么意思
What do you mean?
你靠什么营生的
What do you do for a living?
问这干什么 你好假装有兴趣吗
Why? So you can pretend like you’re interested?
好吧
OK.
你的笑中透着病态的绝望
You have a kind of sick desperation in your laugh.
我们的手提箱一模一样
We have the exact same briefcase.
肥皂
Soap.
什么
Sorry?
我是制♥造♥和销♥售♥肥皂的
I make and I sell soap.
这可是文明的准绳
The yardstick of civilization.
我就是这样认识了
And this is how I met…
Tyler Durden
Tyler Durden.
你知道把等量的汽油和冰冻浓缩橙汁混合后
Did you know if you mix equal parts of gasoline and frozen orange juice concentrate,
能做成凝固汽油弹吗
you can make napalm?
– 不 我不知道 真的吗 – 是真的
– No, I did not that. Is that true? – That’s right.
用简单的日用品就能做出各种炸♥弹♥
One can make all kinds of explosives using simple household items.
真的假的
Really?
只要你想
If one were so inclined.
Tyler 你是我目前为止碰到的”一次性”朋友中最有趣的一个
Tyler, you are by far the most interesting single-serving friend I have ever met.
你看 飞机上所有东西都是一次性的
You see, everything on a plane is single-serving…
我懂了 很聪明
Oh, I get it. It’s very clever.
谢谢
Thank you.
对你帮助大吗
How’s that working out for you?
– 什么 – 聪明啊
– What? – Being clever.
挺好的
Great.
那就继续保持吧 再接再厉
Keep it up, then. Keep it right up.
现在有个礼节问题 我经过的时候是屁♥股♥还是裆部对着你
Now, a question of etiquette. As I pass, do I give you the ass or the crotch?
我怎么会沦落到和Tyler住在一起呢
How I came to live with Tyler is…
航♥空♥公♥司♥对震动的行李有相关政策
Airlines have this policy about vibrating luggage.
它 它在滴答响吗
Was… was it ticking?
其实 丢手不担心嘀嗒声 因为现代炸♥弹♥不会嘀嗒了
Actually throwers don’t worry about ticking, ’cause modern bombs don’t tick.
什么 丢手
Sorry. Throwers?
行李装运员
Baggage handlers.
但如果行李箱震动的话 他们就得报♥警♥
But when a suitcase vibrates, the throwers have to call the police.
我的行李箱震动了吗
My suitcase was vibrating?
十有八♥九♥是电动剃须刀 不过
Nine times out of ten it’s an electric razor, but…
偶尔也会是个
every once in a while…
震动棒
it’s a dildo.
当然公♥司♥规定如果是震动棒的话 我们不能透露其拥有者是谁
Of course it’s company policy never to imply ownership in the event of a dildo.
我们只能说是”一个震动棒” 决不能说”你的震动棒”
We have to use the indefinite article, “a dildo”, never, “your dildo”.
我没有
I don’t own…
我所有的东西都在那个手提箱里
I had everything in that suitcase.
我的CK衬衫 我的DKNY鞋 我的AX领带
My CK shirts. My DKNY shoes. My AX ties.