女招待（2007）

Fine, it was fine.
一个新医生 男的
New doctor, a man.
男的
A man, wow.
他是单身吗? 也许会适合道恩
Is he single? Maybe he’s good for dawn.
不 我想我有看到他戴戒指了
No, I think he was wearing a ring.
奇怪的家伙 有点紧张
Weird guy, nervous.
来自康涅狄格
From Connecticut.
嘿 亲爱的 你能帮我个忙吗?
Hey, honey, could you do me a favor?
什么事?
What?
老乔刚来了 坐在我的辖区
Old Joe just came in and sat in my station.
你能去招呼他吗? 我今天没法对付他
Could you take him? I can’t deal with him today.
你被我善于对付他
You’re better with him than I am.
嗯 好的 我来招呼他
Yeah, sure, I’ll take him.
谢谢 亲爱的 你真是我救星
Thanks, hon., you’re a trooper.
什么? 怎么了?
What? What’s wrong?
你没事吧? 你不舒服吗?
You okay? You going to be sick?
我没事
I’m okay
突然一阵恶心
Just nauseous for a second.
快点 开工了
Hurry up, let’s get to work!
嗨 乔
Hi, Joe.
你今天感觉如何 我的朋友?
How you doing today, my friend?
我能为你做什么?
What can I get you?
这是我的派店
This is my pie diner.
我拥有它
I own it.
我知道是你的 乔
I know you do, Joe.
而且我觉得这里太热了 我知道我很热
And I think it’s warm in here. I know I’m warm.
我会跟卡尔说的 亲爱的
I’ll tell cal, hon.
他们把我的生意都搞的很热
They keep all my businesses too warm on the inside.
我的加油站 我的超♥市♥ 我的洗衣店
My gas station, my supermarket, my laundromat …
但这是我最心爱的生意
but this is my favorite business.
乔的派店
Joe’s pie shop.
我就是乔
I’m Joe.
我他妈的是不会容忍♥这里太热的
And I will not tolerate it being too damn warm in here.
你听到了 乔
I hear you, Joe.
把空调打开
Turn the air on.
是的 先生 我的朋友
Yes, sirree , bub .
好的
Okay.
我要两杯水 不加冰
I want two glasses of water, no ice.
两杯 没问题
Two glasses, no problem.
-两杯 -对
-Two glasses. -Right.
不加冰
No ice.
我要一份”坏宝宝乳蛋派” 旁边配以西红柿
And I want the “bad baby quiche pie” with tomato on the side,
单独放在小盘里
on its own plate.
不要土豆吗?
No potatoes with that?
我有说到土豆吗?
Did I say anything about potatoes?
哪里来的什么土豆?
Where’d you get potatoes from?
不要土豆 要西红柿
No potatoes, tomato.
单独放在小盘里
On its own plate.
还有盐和胡椒粉
Salt and pepper.
可以了吗?
That everything?
还有
No.
我要橙汁
I want orange juice.
但别先上
But don’t bring that first.
先上水
Bring the water first.
橙汁和正餐一起上
Bring the orange juice with the meal.
好吧 走前听一下我的星运走势
Okay, listen to my horoscope before you skedaddle away.
宝瓶座…
“Aquarius…
由于火星进入了你的内星轨 今天运势平稳
smooth sailing today as mars enters your inner circle.”
鬼才知道是什么意思
Whatever the hell that means.
你爱的人今天会倾听你的诉说
“The ones you love will listen carefully to you today,
但你要小心你要说的话
just make sure you’re careful with what you say.”
我可没爱的人
Hmm. I don’t have ones I love.
想听听你的星运走势吗?
Want to hear yours?
我也是宝瓶座的 亲爱的
Uh, I’m Aquarius, too, hon.
我也没有爱的人
I don’t have ones I love either.
只有个同居的人
Just ones I live with.
请原谅 我觉得我要吐了
Excuse me, I feel like I’m going to be sick.
你没事吧 甜心?
You okay, sweetie?
嗯 我很好
Yeah, I’m okay.
好的 听着 我今晚有个五分钟的盲约 (盲约指与未曾见面的陌生人约会)
Good. Listen, um, I have a five-minute blind date tonight
和一个名叫皮特的保险推销员
with an insurance salesman named Pete.
5尺10寸 37岁 不秃顶 照片看上去不错
Five foot 10, 37, all his hair, nice picture,
-爱好垂钓 -五分钟的约会?
-loves fishing. -Five-minute date?
这家伙买♥♥不起单吗?
Can’t the guy pay for the whole thing?
这是我的主意
Yeah, see, um, I have this idea.
我通过个人广♥告♥来找男朋友
I’m meeting men through personal ads,
单我只给他们五分钟时间
but I just give them five minutes.
无论我们是否喜欢对方
Whether or not we like each other,
我们只在一起待五分钟
-we just have five minutes together. -Huh.
那样的话即使对方让我作呕
That way, you know, if the guy makes me sick,
我也不会为此而浪费一个晚上
I don’t waste a whole evening. Anyway, I’m supposed
无论如何 今晚7点在班西 我要去见见那家伙
to meet this guy at 7:00 at banshee’s.
我是想你能不能在我去之前
I was wondering if you would do a full makeup
在盥洗室帮我化个浓妆啊
for me here in the bathroom, before I leave?
为了五分钟化浓妆?
A full makeup for five minutes?
嗯 是啊 留下好的第一印象很重要
Well, yeah, it’s very important to make a good first impression.
我说万一他是个白马王子呢
I mean, wh-what if he’s prince charming?
哪有那等好事
There is no such thing.
无论如何
Whatever.
你能帮帮我吗?
Will you do that for me?
嗯 当然
Yeah, of course.
你还能为我做一个你的
Oh, would you also make me your
“坠入情网巧克力泡沫派”吗?
“falling in love chocolate mousse pie”?
那是我最喜欢的派
That is my favorite pie.
老天 我会凑空做的 好吗?
What the heck, I’ll do it during my break, okay?
你是世上最仁慈最和善的人
You are the queen of kindness and goodness.
你有小孩啦?
You with child?
小声点
Shh, quiet.
我以前也在一个女人 的脸上见过那表情
I’ve seen that look on a woman’s face before.
她名叫安妮特
Name was Annette.
1948年的整个夏天 我都在与她巫山云雨
I made sweet love to her all through the summer of 1948.
那段时间她也有你那样的病容
She got that sick look on her face like you had all through the fall.
我差点就和她结婚了
I almost married her right up.
但孩子最后掉了
She lost the baby, though.
不接电♥话♥
Close call.
你什么时候有的?
When you due?
轻点 乔
Shh, Joe…
别让卡尔听到 你别让我失业啊
don’t want cal to hear. You can’t lose my job.
我正尽力存钱好离开我老公
I’m trying to save money so I can leave my husband.
为什么 他怎么不好了?
Why, what’s wrong with him?
嘿 桌上没有盐和胡椒粉啊
Hey, there’s no salt and pepper
我有要盐和胡椒粉
on the table. I asked for salt and pepper
而且橙汁里不要加冰
and no ice in my juice glass.
你没听懂我说的吗?
-Can’t you get nothing I say right? -I’ll go get
我去给你拿盐和胡椒粉 还有不加冰的橙汁
your salt and pepper and juice with no ice.
但是你得向我保证
But you got to promise me
你对孩子一事要守口如瓶
you’ll keep your mouth shut about this baby.
什么孩子?
What baby?
好样的
Good man.
亲爱的 厄尔来电♥话♥了
Honey, earl’s on the phone.
告诉他我在忙
-Tell him I’m busy. -You don’t talk to him,
你不跟他说话的话 也许他又会跑过演一出了
he might come over here and cause a scene again.
嗯 好吧
Yeah, okay.
我能问你个问题吗?
Can I ask you a question?
到底是我的幻觉
Is it my imagination,
还是我的左乳确实日益下垂了?
or is my left one drooping down even more today?
我觉得我快成毕加索 的画里的人的模样了
I’m starting to feel like something Picasso would have made.
帮我个忙 亲爱的 给老乔一杯橙汁
Do me a favor, hon., get old Joe some O. J. –
不加冰 否则他会把你的头咬掉的
no ice-or he’ll bite your head off.
-还有盐和胡椒粉 -我会的
-And some salt and pepper. -You got it.
你好 厄尔