外遇
The affair.
乔 我没有什么外遇
Shh, Joe, I’m not having no affair.
好吧 你没有外遇
Okay, you’re not having no affair.
在为我点菜前想不想
Want to hear your horoscope
先听一听你的星运走势?
before I give you my order?
不想
No.
太糟了 听着
Too bad, here it is.
宝瓶座
“Aquarius.
如果你真的有外遇了
“Lf, indeed, you’re having an affair,
也许是个反思的好时机
“it might be a good time to step back,
看清楚你自己的生活
“look at your life
重新衡量一下得失
and reassess things a bit.”
那上面可没这么写
It don’t say that in there.
不 有这么写
Yes, it does.
还说 即使你有个 可怜可悲又可恶的丈夫
It says, “even if you have a miserable, snake husband,
你也不应该有外遇
“you probably shouldn’t be having no affair,
因为这降低了你的人品
“’cause it’s beneath you
让你看着就像个普通的淫♥妇♥
“and could make you seem like a common hussy.
更不用提你可能给别人带来的困扰了
“Not to mention the pain you could cause other people.”
这些都是你瞎编的
You’re just making that up.
这次我要吃那个”歌♥唱的小金枪鱼砂锅菜”
This afternoon I want the “singing tuna fish casserole”
不要腌肉
no pickle on the plate.
全熟的法式炸薯条
Well-done frenchies fries
涂着融化的瑞士硬干酪的那种
with melted Swiss cheese
肉汁要单独放在一个盘子里
and gravy on their own plate,
还要一个”吉娜特♥供♥草莓巧克力绿洲派”
and “Jenna’s special strawberry chocolate oasis pie.”
听清楚了么?
You got that?
我记下了
I got that.
吉娜 笑一下嘛
Give me a smile, Jenna.
没人能像你一样做出那么好吃的草莓巧克力派
Nobody makes strawberry chocolate pie the way you do.
星期三是我一周里最开心的一天
Wednesday’s my favorite day of the week,
因为我能来吃上一小口
’cause I get to have a slice of it.
我一早起来就开始惦记着这个了
I think about it as I’m waking up.
那个派 能消除这世上的一切烦忧
Could solve all the problems with the world, that pie.
没那么夸张吧
You’re making too much of it.
就是个派而已
It’s just a pie.
就是个派?
Just a pie?
绝对是出自大♥师♥之手
It’s downright expert.
一种美的享受
A thing of beauty.
那美妙的滋味一个接着一个 在你脑中展现
How each flavor opens itself, one by one,
就像在读一本好书
like a chapter in a book.
最开始 一种奇异的味道刺♥激♥了你的味蕾
First the flavor of an exotic spice hits you,
但那只是一个小小的暗示
just a hint of it.
紧接着 巧克力里的味道沁满了你的嘴
And then you’re flooded with chocolate,
隐约中 透露着苦涩的甘甜
dark and bittersweet,
就像是往日的恋情
like an old love affair.
最后 是草莓
And finally, strawberry;
就是草莓的味道
the way strawberry was always supposed to taste,
但你却难以形容
but never knew how.
事实上
In fact,
听我说
I tell you what.
别管我点的其它什么了
Forget all the other stuff I ordered.
我就要那个超棒的派
Just bring me the damn pie.
我想要的只有那个
That’s all I want.
我才不在乎什么
I don’t care if it’s not
平衡膳食
a well-balanced meal.
我就要吃那个派
Just bring me the pie.
你知道么 老乔我剩下的日子不多了?
Old joe’ll maybe not have much longer to live, you know?
那我最好还是马上把派端上来
Then I better bring you the pie right away.
是的 你最好快点
Yes , you better.
-我爱你 -哦
-I love you! – Oh!
我爱你的咪♥咪♥ 我爱你的咪♥咪♥
I love your breast. I love your breast.
我爱你这边的咪♥咪♥嗯 我也喜欢你这边的咪♥咪♥
I love this breast! Mmm! I like this breast, too!

Oh!
恩 卡尔 这是菜单
Uh, there’s my order, cal,
我需要一点儿清静
and I’m going to need a slice of oasis.
马上就要吐了
Gonna go throw up now.
吉娜
Jenna.
-喔 -不 卡尔
– Whoa! – No, cal!
-吉娜 -嘿
– Jenna! – Hey!
吉娜 我不是故意的
I didn’t plan it, Jenna.
这只是碰巧发生了
It just happened.
他有双非常强壮的手
He’s got such nice, strong hands.
你的丈夫真可怜
Your poor husband.
我可怜的丈夫穿着尿布
My poor husband wears a diaper,
不停的咒骂 他睡在另一个屋里
curses constantly and sleeps in a separate room.
那你为什么不和他离婚呢?
So why don’t you just divorce him then?
我不能这样离开一个生病 发疯的老头
I can’t just leave a sick, crazy, old man.
那么干的都是什么样的人?
What kind of person would do that?
我不知道
I don’t know.
和卡尔搞在一起的 又是什么样的人?
What kind of person has an affair with cal,
卡尔是娶了埃塞尔的人
who’s married to Ethel,
是我们成天都能见到的人
who we see all the time?
他说她糟透了
He says she’s awful.
可能任何和你结婚相处了
Maybe anyone you stay married to
15年的人 都会开始看起来很糟
for 15 years starts to seem awful.
但是 我们了解埃塞尔 她一点也不坏
But we know Ethel. She’s not awful.
她常让卡尔不要冲我们吼
She tells cal not to yell at us.
嘿 你该帮我说话 而不是埃塞尔
Hey, you’re supposed to be my friend, not Ethel’s.
外遇是一件可怕的事
Having an affair is a terrible thing to do.
它能毁了人的生活
It destroys people’s lives,
我不希望你的生活变得一团糟
and I don’t want you messed up with all that.
吉娜 有个可爱的男人
Jenna, there’s this cute guy here
来找你
to see you.
他说他是你的医生
He says he’s your doctor.
太是时候了 真是太是时候了
That’s perfect. Just perfect.
你来这做什么?
What are you doing here?
-你不能来这 -我有一小时空闲
– You can’t just come here. – I had an hour to kill.
我想要见你
I wanted to see you.
这个派是你做的? 太好吃了
Did you make this pie? It’s bliss.
一定是你做的
Of course you made it.
我得回去工作了
I got to get back to work.
我什么时候还能再见到你?
When can I see you again?
波马特医生
Dr. Pomatter,
我不停在想
I’ve been thinking.
我们不能再这样下去了
I think we need to end this.
-我们可以 -不
– No. – Yes.
为什么?
Why?
因为这让我觉得我是个坏人
Because I feel like a bad person,
-我不能再那样生活了 -吉娜…
– and I can’t live with that. – Jenna…
不 什么都别说了
no, don’t say anything.
别再说那些让人紧张贴心的话
Don’t get all nervous and sweet.
别再劝我了
Don’t talk me out of it.
请你安心把派吃完 然后离开 谢谢
Just, please, finish your pie and go. Please.
对不起
I’m sorry.
最后一盘
Last piece.
今天比平常卖♥♥得都好
Sold out even faster than usual today.
对我们来说不错
Good on us.
谢谢
Thanks.
卡尔…
Cal…
什么?
yeah?
你开心么?
Are you happy?
我是说 你认为自己是个快乐的人么?
I mean, would you call yourself a happy man?
好吧 既然你问我这么严肃的问题
Well, if you’re asking me a serious question,
我可以告诉你
I’ll tell you.
我很快乐
I’m happy enough.
我不奢求得到许多 付出许多
I don’t expect much, give much,
我没有得到许多
I don’t get much.
无论遇到的怎样的事 我通常都乐在其中
I generally enjoy whatever comes up.
这是实话 总的说来以你们女性的判断标准
That’s my truth, summed up for your feminine judgment.

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